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Angel on your shoulder--stupid mistakes
#1
What is the stupidest thing you ever did, the thing which probably should have killed you and didn't?

I drove ten miles, dead drunk, down the wrong way on a divided road, passed several cars, hit none. Didn't know what I had done until I got to the end and saw the signs. That could have ended very badly.
“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe.” ― Albert Einstein

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#2
Walked across a board between two buildings that was probably 50 ft in the air while drunk at the old powder factory which I couldn't even tell you where it is. Part or all of that could also have been made up in my head.
“History teaches that grave threats to liberty often come in times of urgency, when constitutional rights seem too extravagant to endure.”-Thurgood Marshall

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#3
stayed up all night with a chicky-poo in college, only to drive home, 2 hours away, at 6 in the morning, dead tired and still drunk from the night before.  I was going home to go hunting with some old friends that day.  Anyways, I woke up in the middle of a gravel road intersection a mile off the pavement, about 10 miles from home.  still to this day I can't figure out how I ended up there.  my theory is I had to pull off the road to take a leak and just kept driving?  Obviously, not one of my better ideas to go back home that morning, but I did get lucky the night before. 
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Deceitful, two-faced she-woman. Never trust a female, Delmar, remember that one simple precept and your time with me will not have been ill spent.

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#4
(11-14-2017, 01:04 PM)michaelsean Wrote: Walked across a board between two buildings that was probably 50 ft in the air while drunk at the old powder factory which I couldn't even tell you where it is.  Part or all of that could also have been made up in my head.

I know exactly where it is...  if you ever wanna go back


Mine would be Pulled an all nighter... Drove 3.5 hours away earily in the morning to go to cousins wedding... Hung out with them all day... And drove back around 11 that night still with no sleep.

Had to keep shaking my head as the lights in front of me were doing weird things. Eventually stopped and got coffee..
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#5
(11-14-2017, 04:49 PM)XenoMorph Wrote: I know exactly where it is...  if you ever wanna go back


Mine would be Pulled an all nighter...  Drove 3.5 hours away earily in the morning to go to cousins wedding...     Hung out with them all day... And drove back around 11 that night still with no sleep.

Had to keep shaking my head as the lights in front of me were doing weird things.  Eventually stopped and got coffee..

Whereabouts is it?  I keep thinking Loveland area.

That driving when you start near hallucinating and forget the last five minutes is scary stuff and it's hard to make yourself pull over.
“History teaches that grave threats to liberty often come in times of urgency, when constitutional rights seem too extravagant to endure.”-Thurgood Marshall

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#6
(11-14-2017, 05:12 PM)michaelsean Wrote: Whereabouts is it?  I keep thinking Loveland area.

That driving when you start near hallucinating and forget the last five minutes is scary stuff and it's hard to make yourself pull over.

your close... Its just north of kings island...

Kings mills exit #25 I think on 71... (if coming north go right...) follow the road straight (so left lane not including turn lanes left laneturn goes to mcDs and right lane forces you to go right)   this road will take you down the hill and over the river to the powder factory you go.



Yeah for my crazy driving experience I kept seeing the tail lights ahead merging together.. several times it looked like a big rig rolling over and over.. probly worse than when I had a 102 fever driving home from work lol
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#7
On my twenty first birthday I went to a bar in the far westend.Got drunk on multiple beers,then rode around on my motorcycle for a while.I felt like I was doing my best riding ( hugging curves,speeding,stop light racing ).
Don't remember how I got home.That was the last time operating a vehicle impaired ( 1974 ).
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#8
One that quickly comes to mind for me was a Christmas party when I was 19, 20 somewhere abouts. I got smashed out of my head drunk, several beers, shots of Jack Daniels, Jim Bean, etc. Smoking left handed cigarettes, took a valium. Last thing I remember was around midnight.

I woke up at home the next day around noon totally disoriented, staggered to my window overlooking driveway and my Camaro was nearly completely sideways in it.

I totally have no memory of what happened, where I went, how I got there, or how my car ended up in the driveway sideways. I asked many of my fellow party goers and nobody could say for sure where I went or what happened.

The obvious answer is I drove home but lord of I have no idea how ? So easily could have ended very differently !

I got so extremely lucky.
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#9
I ran a 1/4 mile last week. Damn near died.



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#10
(11-18-2017, 01:23 PM)HarleyDog Wrote: I ran a 1/4 mile last week. Damn near died.

Was somebody chasing you?  Cuz that's the only way I'd run a quarter mile.
“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe.” ― Albert Einstein

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#11
(11-18-2017, 02:54 PM)McC Wrote: Was somebody chasing you?  Cuz that's the only way I'd run a quarter mile.

Ummm... No? Why do you ask? 



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#12
(11-18-2017, 01:23 PM)HarleyDog Wrote: I ran a 1/4 mile last week. Damn near died.

Run Forest, run!



I ran to the fridge once.

I also run to the bathroom a lot! Especially after eating wings n beers.

I ran over a squirrel too.
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Deceitful, two-faced she-woman. Never trust a female, Delmar, remember that one simple precept and your time with me will not have been ill spent.

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#13
I took one of those circular 25 mph exit ramps at about 55 mph. Of course I lost control and ended up down a ditch. I wasn't wearing a seat belt, but miraculously wasn't injured. I barely moved in my seat.

Oh yeah. It was 4 in the morning. I was f***ed up, and drove my car outta the ditch because a trucker saw the whole thing.
I'm gonna break every record they've got. I'm tellin' you right now. I don't know how I'm gonna do it, but it's goin' to get done.

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#14
When I was about 12, my friend and I were riding dirt bikes and came across an old water tower n a hill back in the fields. It had covered ladders, but the hatch covering one was open...so we climbed it. We got to the top and there was a small room that had a hatch that opened into the tank itself. We decided that going for a swim would be a good idea. I said "I'll go if you go" and so did my friend. We both stood there looking at each other to see who would go first. My friend suggested we go back home to get our swimsuits, then come back and swim. I agreed.

It wasn't until halfway home that a huge chill ran down my spine as I realized that if we had gone in, there would have been no way to get back out since the water was about 6-10 feet below the hatch. The scary part is, that if one of us had jumped in, the other would have surely followed. Nobody would have heard us calling for help...and they likely would not have found us until they found the dirt bikes,,,,or the water started tasting funny.
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#15
(11-18-2017, 01:23 PM)HarleyDog Wrote: I ran a 1/4 mile last week. Damn near died.


I get asked why I run 3 days a week I alwas say it isn't for my health lol.

To the OP:  Climbed under then jumped off a bridge that crosses the Ohio River. Car Surfing (Michael J Fox made it look so easy in teen wolf). Grabbed ahold of a car while on a bicycle that didn't end well.
I have the Heart of a Lion! I also have a massive fine and a lifetime ban from the Pittsburgh Zoo...

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#16
I climbed down a building by jumping from each floor balcony while definitely drunk ...

Sad

And again I say unto you, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.

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#17
There were two things and one is even Bengal's related. On Halloween, 1989 I was driving home from a friend's house after we had gone together to the Dayton Oregon district and had way more than just a few. I was in a little French maid's outfit and had to go all the way from Hartwell to Owensville, where I lived at the time. I pulled onto the wrong frigging ramp of the Cross County Highway (which is now the Ronald Reagan expressway) and there was a cop coming from the other direction!

He was a young cop, no more than late 20's and he was from Mt. Orab, which is close to Owensville. Both things worked in my favor and I think it also impressed him I could walk a straight line in heels. He just said "Be very, very careful," because he must have known that I was loaded but was also scared sober, sort of, by him stopping me. Because that was a huge break, I decided to quit smoking cigarettes. It wasn't that difficult.

But luck runs out sooner or later. For the Bengal's first playoff game with Andy, which was Jan 7, 2012, I'd had three or four strong vodka cranberries by halftime. My friend who owned the house where I was living then (in California) got really mad because the garage door opener wouldn't work. She asked me to try to figure out what was wrong with it. I thought there would be a reset button on it I could try first.

Even though I'm tall, the reset button was on the garage door opener motor on the ceiling. I pushed a cooler over to it thinking I could just use it as a step stool. A little voice inside me said "you know, maybe you should get the step ladder from the shed," but I just brushed that off and climbed on top of the cooler to reach for the reset button. Well, the cooler had a rounded edge at the bottom. When one of my feet hit the side the cooler toppled over and I cartwheeled over and landed squarely onto my wrist.

The fall broke the radius bone of my wrist clearly in half. Because of the strong vodka cranberries I didn't feel it though. I had to call 911 for an ambulance to the hospital and though they set it there, I also had to have an orthopedic doctor do something called a "closed reduction" and pin it so it would heal right. Thankfully, I had CA Blue Shield insurance at the time and only had to pay about $300 out of pocket for that whole mess. Wow, did I learn though.
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#18
Honestly so many to remember. I lot of them car related and drinking beer, etc.

But the one I’ll share was with a buddy and when i was growing up. We went out on Winton Lake which is a park here locally. It was ice covered and when we walked out on to the middle of the lake, we heard that awful sound, which I’ll never forget, of a cracking sound around us. We both looked at each other, didn’t say a single word and just sprinted back to the shoreline, each step with the ice collapsing behind us. I don’t know how we made it.
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