Mansplaining

[Bengalzona]

Anyone ever accused of this or ever accused someone else of it?

A friend of mine posted this on her FB page:



My first thought is, "I don't do that." And then, I thought, "Do I?". And then I returned to my initial thought.


I was thinking about this this weekend. Back in the day, didn't we just use to refer to people as "know-it-alls" or "smart asses"? And it was generally conducted by people with deep insecurity who felt a need to prove something. And didn't this used to be a gender-neutral behavior?

When did explaining something become "an attack on women"? You know, I can understand how it could be viewed that way if someone starts an explanation with "Looky here, little lady....". That is definitely old school chauvinism, right?

Somebody fill me in. How do you define "mansplaining"? Mansplain to me, if you have to. Is this behavior purely something men do? Or do women do it too?

[hollodero]

(07-30-2018, 05:35 PM)Bengalzona Wrote: I was thinking about this this weekend. Back in the day, didn't we just use to refer to people as "know-it-alls" or "smart asses"? And it was generally conducted by people with deep insecurity who felt a need to prove something. And didn't this used to be a gender-neutral behavior?

When did explaining something become "an attack on women"? You know, I can understand how it could be viewed that way if someone starts an explanation with "Looky here, little lady....". That is definitely old school chauvinism, right?

Somebody fill me in. How do you define "mansplaining"? Mansplain to me, if you have to.

Sure. First off, I need to explain to you that the psychological assessment "there are deep insecurities that do this and that" usually is quite pointless. Everyone has some deep insecurities, doesn't mean everyone's a smartass. Just me. 

Second, it sounds like you'd ridicule deep, hidden insecurities. You should not. I tried more open insecurities once, doesn't fare too well with the environment either.

Third, I cannot mansplain anything to you. You're a male, I'm a male, I only can be a smartass. Now if you were a woman, I sure could mansplain the world to you. I could mansplain to you things about insecurities, or how the word "mansplain" really just is used by insecure women who have to resort to made up gender stereotypes to deal with an unpleasant experience. I would be wrong probably, but since you asked you wouldn't know better. Right.

Fourth, there is no denying that there are still lots of men who deep down believe they are just smarter than an average woman can possibly be with her ladybrain. Whoever has such an attitude probably shows it from time to time. Also, of course there are also insecure men who overcompensate by believing everyone is at least the same amount of insecure, or who have to actively change a person's image to that wanted perception. Women are usually a good target for that, also openly insecure men. There's certainly an incentive.

Fifth. You explain stuff without being asked to do so, and you might be percieved as degrading someone, to a person in need of your intellectual help which was graciously provided. It can be off-putting to be put in that position. When there's a pattern of you doing it selectively (e.g. towards women) instead all of the time, you might be called a mansplainer. If you're doing it all the time, you might also be called a mansplainer, of course.

I guess that's all.

[treee]

Probably a relic of a bygone era where men occupied 99% of the work force, and therefor had a more "worldly view" and talked down to women because their spectrum of experiences were not as broad. Just a guess though.

[Bengalzona]

(07-30-2018, 06:22 PM)hollodero Wrote: Sure. First off, I need to explain to you that the psychological assessment "there are deep insecurities that do this and that" usually is quite pointless. Everyone has some deep insecurities, doesn't mean everyone's a smartass. Just me. 

Second, it sounds like you'd ridicule deep, hidden insecurities. You should not. I tried more open insecurities once, doesn't fare too well with the environment either.

Third, I cannot mansplain anything to you. You're a male, I'm a male, I only can be a smartass. Now if you were a woman, I sure could mansplain the world to you. I could mansplain to you things about insecurities, or how the word "mansplain" really just is used by insecure women who have to resort to made up gender stereotypes to deal with an unpleasant experience. I would be wrong probably, but since you asked you wouldn't know better. Right.

Fourth, there is no denying that there are still lots of men who deep down believe they are just smarter than an average woman can possibly be with her ladybrain. Whoever has such an attitude probably shows it from time to time. Also, of course there are also insecure men who overcompensate by believing everyone is at least the same amount of insecure, or who have to actively change a person's image to that wanted perception. Women are usually a good target for that, also openly insecure men. There's certainly an incentive.

Fifth. You explain stuff without being asked to do so, and you might be percieved as degrading someone, to a person in need of your intellectual help which was graciously provided. It can be off-putting to be put in that position. When there's a pattern of you doing it selectively (e.g. towards women) instead all of the time, you might be called a mansplainer. If you're doing it all the time, you might also be called a mansplainer, of course.

I guess that's all.

What is that, "Eurosplaining"?

[Millhouse]

Oh whew. At first when I open this thread I thought this was going to be about girls against Manspreading. But then I re-read the title to my delight.

[HarleyDog]

Ahhh. The diagram. A reminder that for every right, there are at least 2 wrongs.

[Belsnickel]

(07-30-2018, 06:22 PM)hollodero Wrote: Fifth. You explain stuff without being asked to do so, and you might be percieved as degrading someone, to a person in need of your intellectual help which was graciously provided. It can be off-putting to be put in that position. When there's a pattern of you doing it selectively (e.g. towards women) instead all of the time, you might be called a mansplainer. If you're doing it all the time, you might also be called a mansplainer, of course.

(07-30-2018, 06:44 PM)treee Wrote: Probably a relic of a bygone era where men occupied 99% of the work force, and therefor had a more "worldly view" and talked down to women because their spectrum of experiences were not as broad. Just a guess though.

This combination can best describe it. I think that the big reason this has become a thing as of late is because women feel, and legitimately so, that they are being pushed out of a lot of conversations. Mansplaining is an attempt to push them out of a conversation and is often very condescending. We also see this sort of thing in other categories. Whitesplaining, straightsplaining, and cissplaining are all things that I have seen people refer to. Oftentimes, people are called out for it most when they are injecting themselves into a conversation about gender, sexuality, race, etc., and disregarding the point of view of the minority, not acknowledging the position of privilege from which they speak.

That being said, those aren't the only times it is called out. Those are just the times I have seen most often.

[Beaker]

[Bengalzona]

(07-30-2018, 08:14 PM)Belsnickel Wrote: This combination can best describe it. I think that the big reason this has become a thing as of late is because women feel, and legitimately so, that they are being pushed out of a lot of conversations. Mansplaining is an attempt to push them out of a conversation and is often very condescending. We also see this sort of thing in other categories. Whitesplaining, straightsplaining, and cissplaining are all things that I have seen people refer to. Oftentimes, people are called out for it most when they are injecting themselves into a conversation about gender, sexuality, race, etc., and disregarding the point of view of the minority, not acknowledging the position of privilege from which they speak.

That being said, those aren't the only times it is called out. Those are just the times I have seen most often.

I see.

Personally, I equate the use of the term to the way some guys refer to women with strong leadership instincts with derogatory terms (i.e. I generally don't see it as valid).

I also agree with Treee in that it is a product of a bygone era, a time of chauvinism that still lives on today in the imaginations of old bigoted men and equally old women's rights activist, the latter who feel the need to spread messages of anger to younger generations based upon their own old wounds that have never healed.

As for other categories (whitesplaining, straightsplaining, etc.), I'm not really addressing those. There may or may not be a just cause for that sort of terminology. I'm not judging.

[*michaelsean*]

I’m sorry but if I don’t explain it to her, who is going to? Another broad?

[*michaelsean*]

(07-30-2018, 08:14 PM)Belsnickel Wrote: This combination can best describe it. I think that the big reason this has become a thing as of late is because women feel, and legitimately so, that they are being pushed out of a lot of conversations. Mansplaining is an attempt to push them out of a conversation and is often very condescending. We also see this sort of thing in other categories. Whitesplaining, straightsplaining, and cissplaining are all things that I have seen people refer to. Oftentimes, people are called out for it most when they are injecting themselves into a conversation about gender, sexuality, race, etc., and disregarding the point of view of the minority, not acknowledging the position of privilege from which they speak.

That being said, those aren't the only times it is called out. Those are just the times I have seen most often.

I don’t know. The groups you mention don’t exactly seem shy about telling people not of those groups what they are doing or saying incorrectly.

[Beaker]

Mansplaining is another myth...women never shut up long enough for men to get in 3 words anyway.

[BmorePat87]

White, middle class progressive girl I went to middle and high school with posts articles written by woman of color about issues involving people of color.

Good friend (actually the Bengals fan friend who got me posting here years ago) who is Syrian responds with his own thoughts on the issue as a minority. Uses the phrase "simply put" at the end to sum up his thought.

White girl then just responds with a myriad of mansplaining memes.

I tell my friend to respond with "I guess my experience as a person of color doesn't really apply. Thanks for whitesplaining this for me", knowing it would crush her, but he says "No, I'm better than her and that bullshit".



Men are often times dicks, both to other men and women, especially in situations where they think they know more. Women certainly do have issues gaining the same level of respect in the professional world and with the presumption of competence. But using the word "mainsplain" anytime a guy chimes in is just stupid. I'm more hesitant to correct misconceptions about how our government works that are vocalized on facebook if it's a woman rather than a man, because I don't want to deal with this crap.

[BmorePat87]

The problem with the graphic is it suggests that all unsolicited advice and knowledge to a woman lacking experience from a man who is more experienced is mansplaining.

This suggests that every time I spoke to my rookie colleagues during summer school last month, giving my suggestions and experience based on 7 years with the program, it was mansplaining when they were women but not when they were men. To me, I was just sharing my experience with others because I feel like my profession benefits from that.

[Bengalzona]

(07-31-2018, 11:10 AM)BmorePat87 Wrote: White, middle class progressive girl I went to middle and high school with posts articles written by woman of color about issues involving people of color.

Good friend (actually the Bengals fan friend who got me posting here years ago) who is Syrian responds with his own thoughts on the issue as a minority. Uses the phrase "simply put" at the end to sum up his thought.

White girl then just responds with a myriad of mansplaining memes.

I tell my friend to respond with "I guess my experience as a person of color doesn't really apply. Thanks for whitesplaining this for me", knowing it would crush her, but he says "No, I'm better than her and that bullshit".



Men are often times dicks, both to other men and women, especially in situations where they think they know more. Women certainly do have issues gaining the same level of respect in the professional world and with the presumption of competence. But using the word "mainsplain" anytime a guy chimes in is just stupid. I'm more hesitant to correct misconceptions about how our government works that are vocalized on facebook if it's a woman rather than a man, because I don't want to deal with this crap.

You see where I'm coming from. It's just a form of name calling, and is often used as a word powerplay to dismiss someone else's thoughts anymore rather than in a proper context.

That may be the case with other types of "-splaining" as well. I admire your friend. He is better than that and has the wisdom to know that.