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Our Offense .vs. Our Defense...who you got!?
#1
Seeing as up to now neither our offense or defense can compete against NFL quality opposition let's have some 'fun' instead....

In a proper scrimmage of ineptitude who would 'win'.

- Andy Dalton would not stop throwing interceptions, BW Webb would not stop dropping them - TIE

- Joe Mixon cannot run the ball, but our D is #32 in rush defense - DEFENSE

- Our LBs cannot cover TE's , but our O thinks it illegal to throw to them - OFFENSE

- Geno & Dunlap are a shadow of themselves, but Price / Redmond/ Hart are afraid of shadows and won't block them - DEFENSE

- Andy Dalton can run a 40yd dash in 6.2 seconds, Our D struggles with jogging QB's on the perimeter - OFFENSE

- Bobby Hart celebrates a DL penalty in a loss like Xmas , Dre Kirkpatrick celebrates his uncovered WR dropping the ball - DEFENSE

- No one knew who Lou Anuramo was , no one knows whether Brian Callahan actually exists - OFFENSE

A close call to be sure , but in front of literally tens of fans at PBS i reckon i back our DEFENSE to win out and limit our OFFENSE to 233 rushing yards (8.1 average) and 4 points (2 safeties) ThumbsUp
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#2
I think our D would definitely win that day.

For all the problems our D has, they still have a talented D line and a secondary full of first and second round picks.

They've held teams surprisingly close in most games while the offense has been sputtering to kick punts in every game this year.

Against Buffalo, we had one of the worst first halves in recent memory, but we still came close to winning that game because the defense kept it competitive.

You could say the same for the Arizona, Baltimore and Jacksonville games, and the Seattle game as well.

I think our defense is much closer to being competitive than our offense is.

If we could get one stud Linebacker and a decent linebacker, I think that will solve 90% of our issues on defense.

But on offense we need a new QB, a new RT, a new RG, a new LG and then depth along the line as well.
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#3
Yeah, it's probably gonna be a tie....

"Better send those refunds..."

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#4
While it’s true the Bengals’ defense is giving up so many yards the league will soon need to use light years to describe the amount, it is also true the defense isn’t giving up too many points. Yesterday against Jacksonville only 17 points can truly be pinned on the defense. That’s a respectable number in the modern offense-driven NFL. I’m pleasantly surprised with Lou Anarumo. He’s no Mike Zimmer but Lou has the defense prepared and they’ve kept the Bengals in five of the seven games so far.
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#5
In training camp, Bengals.com had an article up talking about how awesome BOTH the offense and defense looked in a scrimmage against each other.

I suspect this means that they had good and terrible moments each...and vice versa.
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#6
Our D would get tired out by having to run off the field after every 3 offensive plays
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#7
To misquote Gorilla Monsoon: It's the easily resisted force meets the exceedingly-movable object!
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#8
(10-21-2019, 08:56 AM)Fan_in_Kettering Wrote: I’m pleasantly surprised with Lou Anarumo.  He’s no Mike Zimmer but Lou has the defense prepared and they’ve kept the Bengals in five of the seven games so far.


Please tell me this is a joke.

The defense has much more talent than our offense yet they are statistically worse than our offense.  How'd they do keeping us in that Cardinal game?

Through 7 games the Bengals defense has allowed over 200 rushing yards 4 times.  That is already third worst in team history.  Only the '98 team (5) and the '69 team (6).  have done worse.

Who wants to give me odds of that record falling this year?

BTW I am not defending our offense.  It is horrid, but we have a bunch of backups playing on the line.  Our DBs are starting to get dinged up, but our defense has been relatively healthy.
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#9
Offense all day long. They'd just take Andre's shirt off, make him an eligible runner and the D would be too scared to get anywhere near his man boobs.. 
In the immortal words of my old man, "Wait'll you get to be my age!"

Chicago sounds rough to the maker of verse, but the one comfort we have is Cincinnati sounds worse. ~Oliver Wendal Holmes Sr.


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#10
(10-21-2019, 09:22 AM)THE PISTONS Wrote: In training camp, Bengals.com had an article up talking about how awesome BOTH the offense and defense looked in a scrimmage against each other.

I suspect this means that they had good and terrible moments each...and vice versa.

Surely you jest.. Bengals.com has never been known to blow smoke up our asses. It's the very definition of integrity in journalism.. Geoff Hobson should be this year's Pulitzer prize winner!   Hilarious
In the immortal words of my old man, "Wait'll you get to be my age!"

Chicago sounds rough to the maker of verse, but the one comfort we have is Cincinnati sounds worse. ~Oliver Wendal Holmes Sr.


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#11
How about if the offense played defense, and the defense played offense? Dalton at safety. Jesse Bates at QB. Dunlap at LT. Mixon at LB... Who ya got then?
I'm gonna break every record they've got. I'm tellin' you right now. I don't know how I'm gonna do it, but it's goin' to get done.

- Ja'Marr Chase 
  April 2021
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#12
(10-21-2019, 12:41 PM)jason Wrote: How about if the offense played defense, and the defense played offense? Dalton at safety. Jesse Bates at QB. Dunlap at LT. Mixon at LB... Who ya got then?

Actually that has made me think....maybe both offense and defense would lose - to our special teams  Tongue

I reckon the holy trinity of Huber, Bullock and Clark Harris would be able to kick the asses of any 11 the offense and defense has out there.
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#13
(10-21-2019, 12:24 PM)fredtoast Wrote: Please tell me this is a joke.

The defense has much more talent than our offense yet they are statistically worse than our offense.  How'd they do keeping us in that Cardinal game?

Through 7 games the Bengals defense has allowed over 200 rushing yards 4 times.  That is already third worst in team history.  Only the '98 team (5) and the '69 team (6).  have done worse.

Who wants to give me odds of that record falling this year?

BTW I am not defending our offense.  It is horrid, but we have a bunch of backups playing on the line.  Our DBs are starting to get dinged up, but our defense has been relatively healthy.

The Bengals are 4th  Redzone defense.
https://twitter.com/JAKEAKAJ24
J24

Jessie Bates left the Bengals and that makes me sad!
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#14
(10-21-2019, 02:07 PM)sonofstat Wrote: Actually that has made me think....maybe both offense and defense would lose - to our special teams  Tongue

I reckon the holy trinity of Huber, Bullock and Clark Harris would be able to kick the asses of any 11 the offense and defense has out there.

I'm gonna go ahead and call Darrin Simmons the best coach on the staff...
I'm gonna break every record they've got. I'm tellin' you right now. I don't know how I'm gonna do it, but it's goin' to get done.

- Ja'Marr Chase 
  April 2021
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#15
Both sides are so bad. Can the game just get forfeited?
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#16
Depends on who Huber will play for.
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#17
Depends which side you think is working with the worst position group, OL or LB? I personally think our LB are worse. Our OL can’t run block, but they’ve been halfway decent at pass protection as of late, and that’s with our what, 4th or 5th string LT? The LB are literally good at nothing. They can’t stop the run. They can’t cover TE’s or RB’s. They’re horrible.

Add in that Taylor was supposed to be this young offensive minded genius, and I’m much more frustrated with the offense so far. Dalton looks as bad as he ever has. Our highly talented RB is running for 2 yds in a game, we can’t score TD’s, we don’t use our TE’s, despite taking one in the 2nd round last year. What a mess...

We miss you AJ.

Edit: Forgot to answer the OP question: Defense would win. Outside the Seattle game, the offense has been pathetic.
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#18
(10-21-2019, 03:53 PM)Nicomo Cosca Wrote: Depends which side you think is working with the worst position group, OL or LB? I personally think our LB are worse. Our OL can’t run block, but they’ve been halfway decent at pass protection as of late, and that’s with our what, 4th or 5th string LT? The LB are literally good at nothing. They can’t stop the run. They can’t cover TE’s or RB’s. They’re horrible.

Add in that Taylor was supposed to be this young offensive minded genius, and I’m much more frustrated with the offense so far. Dalton looks as bad as he ever has. Our highly talented RB is running for 2 yds in a game, we can’t score TD’s, we don’t use our TE’s, despite taking one in the 2nd round last year. What a mess...

We miss you AJ.

I was thinking safeties, DL had talent but not showing it , CB should be OK but was not and now injuries....LB is just a car crash and i think is playing a big part in destroying everything...especially in run defense.

On offense i just throw my hands up...have no clue where we are at - i think the malaise is just across the board - talent , injury, scheme, game plan...its all broken.   Hence i would back the Defense in this battle of the truly inept.


Completely agree regarding taylor - the offensive guru pitch when he was hired here just makes the current production even more depressing
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