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Sorry, but I felt this deserved its own thread
#1
From the "Can the Bengals Win Out" thread: My response. Sorry for the self-promotion, but I wanted to share...

Allright. I haven't shared this with anyone, but here is why I think they do win out and win it all:

Long story, I will try to keep it short:

When I walk my lab (mind you, I am on my second lab over the 24 years I have lived in this house) around the neighborhood, I use Kroger grocery bags to pick up his poop. (Stick with me). I usually triple bag it and there is a trash can at the park that I take a "shot" at underhanding the poop bag in the trash can. It has a tiny round opening, but six inches across. I am guessing it is to prevent animals from getting in it.

I take the shot from about 20 yards away. Yes, hitting the shot would be one in a million. I would usually say something like: "If this goes in, Bengals beat the steelers tomorrow", and it almost never goes in. The first one I ever hit was in 2003. The Ohio State Buckeyes were two TD underdogs and, while I am a Buckeye Fan, they aren't even in the same universe as my love for the Bengals. It has always been that way. Well, I said "If I make this, Ohio State will beat Miami and end that program!". Boom! It went right in. I danced around and my dog thought I was having a seizure. Sure enough, they won. I also put a couple hundo on the Buckeyes to win outright. Paid over a grand.

The second time I made the incredible poop shot was last year. I said "If I make this, the Bengals are going to the Super Bowl". Boom! Danced like crazy. After the game, I realized I had only said "make the Super Bowl". Yes, you can all hate me now.

Three weeks ago, after the demoralizing Browns loss, I said "If I make this, the Bengals are going to win all the rest of their games and WIN the Super Bowl". BOOM!!! Right in.

I find it amazing I made it twice in roughly one year after missing so many times over the 24 years I have lived here (although, to be fair, my first lab lived to be 12 and my current lab is just 8, so it was 20 years. If you saw the shot, you might understand. I have hit way more full court basketball shots than this shot.

This is going to sound really insensitive, but my mom passed a few months back and now I take care of my dad, pretty much daily. He's a great man, and I love being there for him. I know my mom was worried about how dad would pay the bills, do laundry, clean, etc. I told her that she didn't have to worry about a thing, and I would take care of him. (She was just 80, and dad is 90 and she did basically everything except mow the lawn). Before she passed, I showed her how I enrolled all their bills in autopay, organized all his investments, tax info, etc. It made her very happy. I'm getting a little emotional now, so forgive me. She would always hug me, tear up, and say "Oh, Steven...". She didn't have to say anything else. I knew she was in a lot of pain (didn't like the way the pain meds made her feel) and to give her a little peace at the end made me very happy.

I could always make my mom laugh, and I thought it was often the best medicine. She was in a hospital bed and I had moved my smart TV to their house in her bedroom so she could watch any movie or series (she loved Ted Lasso) and her favorite actress is Melissa Mccarthey, and mom watched "Bridesmaids" and laughed a lot three days before she passed. Mom was giving me a hug as I was heading home for the night and she said "I'm so grateful" and I stopped her and told her that I was the one who should be grateful for having her as my mom. She teared up (we did this a lot the final few weeks) and, trying to make her laugh, I said "There is one favor I will ask of you". She looked at me and my wry smile and she said "If there is a way I can help the Bengals win it all, I will".


So, in a nutshell, this is why the Bengals will win out and win the Super Bowl.
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1
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#2
Very fun thread and thanks for sharing. If winning out means they beat Cleveland 40-0 that would be extra-good.
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#3
(11-28-2022, 09:21 AM)SHRacerX Wrote: So, in a nutshell, this is why the Bengals will win out and win the Super Bowl.

I support any quark by any of his to bring this to fruition.

Who Dey  
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#4
(11-28-2022, 09:28 AM)WiregrassBenGal Wrote: Very fun thread and thanks for sharing. If winning out means they beat Cleveland 40-0 that would be extra-good.

Agreed. An entertaining read. Don't think you can open up a sports betting advice business based on poop shots, but, hey, you did win based on one. And there is some symmetry between a poop shot and that questionable call that determined the Miami-Ohio State game and ended the Miami dynasty. That flag came in several seconds after the pass was ruled incomplete and Ohio States seemed to have lost.
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#5
(11-28-2022, 09:21 AM)SHRacerX Wrote: So, in a nutshell, this is why the Bengals will win out and win the Super Bowl.

It's not impossible by any stretch. We get Chase back and I like our chances against anybody, period. Speaking of poopin........
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#6
That story starts out shitty and then turns into a heart wrencher .

Not as worried about winning out, but want that SB win as badly as anything in my life.

If Bengals win SB, will vote for "Mom" in the game ball thread for sure.
[Image: 4CV0TeR.png]

The water tastes funny when you're far from your home,
yet it's only the thirsty that hunger to roam. 
          Roam the Jungle !
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#7
(11-28-2022, 09:21 AM)SHRacerX Wrote: From the "Can the Bengals Win Out" thread:  My response.  Sorry for the self-promotion, but I wanted to share...

Allright.  I haven't shared this with anyone, but here is why I think they do win out and win it all:

Long story, I will try to keep it short:

When I walk my lab (mind you, I am on my second lab over the 24 years I have lived in this house) around the neighborhood, I use Kroger grocery bags to pick up his poop.  (Stick with me).  I usually triple bag it and there is a trash can at the park that I take a "shot" at underhanding the poop bag in the trash can.  It has a tiny round opening, but six inches across.  I am guessing it is to prevent animals from getting in it.  

I take the shot from about 20 yards away.  Yes, hitting the shot would be one in a million.  I would usually say something like:  "If this goes in, Bengals beat the steelers tomorrow", and it almost never goes in.  The first one I ever hit was in 2003.  The Ohio State Buckeyes were two TD underdogs and, while I am a Buckeye Fan, they aren't even in the same universe as my love for the Bengals.  It has always been that way.  Well, I said "If I make this, Ohio State will beat Miami and end that program!".  Boom!  It went right in.  I danced around and my dog thought I was having a seizure.  Sure enough, they won.  I also put a couple hundo on the Buckeyes to win outright.  Paid over a grand.

The second time I made the incredible poop shot was last year.  I said "If I make this, the Bengals are going to the Super Bowl".  Boom!  Danced like crazy.  After the game, I realized I had only said "make the Super Bowl".  Yes, you can all hate me now.

Three weeks ago, after the demoralizing Browns loss, I said "If I make this, the Bengals are going to win all the rest of their games and WIN the Super Bowl".  BOOM!!!  Right in.  

I find it amazing I made it twice in roughly one year after missing so many times over the 24 years I have lived here (although, to be fair, my first lab lived to be 12 and my current lab is just 8, so it was 20 years.  If you saw the shot, you might understand.  I have hit way more full court basketball shots than this shot.  

This is going to sound really insensitive, but my mom passed a few months back and now I take care of my dad, pretty much daily.  He's a great man, and I love being there for him.  I know my mom was worried about how dad would pay the bills, do laundry, clean, etc.  I told her that she didn't have to worry about a thing, and I would take care of him.  (She was just 80, and dad is 90 and she did basically everything except mow the lawn).  Before she passed, I showed her how I enrolled all their bills in autopay, organized all his investments, tax info, etc.  It made her very happy.  I'm getting a little emotional now, so forgive me.  She would always hug me, tear up, and say "Oh, Steven...".  She didn't have to say anything else.  I knew she was in a lot of pain (didn't like the way the pain meds made her feel) and to give her a little peace at the end made me very happy.  

I could always make my mom laugh, and I thought it was often the best medicine.  She was in a hospital bed and I had moved my smart TV to their house in her bedroom so she could watch any movie or series (she loved Ted Lasso) and her favorite actress is Melissa Mccarthey, and mom watched "Bridesmaids" and laughed a lot three days before she passed.  Mom was giving me a hug as I was heading home for the night and she said "I'm so grateful" and I stopped her and told her that I was the one who should be grateful for having her as my mom.  She teared up (we did this a lot the final few weeks) and, trying to make her laugh, I said "There is one favor I will ask of you".  She looked at me and my wry smile and she said "If there is a way I can help the Bengals win it all, I will".  


So, in a nutshell, this is why the Bengals will win out and win the Super Bowl.

Awesome brother, what a story lol

For what it is worth....

I believe, God bless. Wink
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#8
Well thats not where I thought you were going with that story. Glad I read the whole thing. Whether we win the SB or not, I'm thrilled that it gave you some peace and good memories with your mom.
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#9
(11-28-2022, 04:28 PM)wcu Wrote: Well thats not where I thought you were going with that story.  Glad I read the whole thing.  Whether we win the SB or not, I'm thrilled that it gave you some peace and good memories with your mom.

Yeah, starts off with throwing dog poop and ends about making you tear up lol
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#10
Great story and thank you for sharing! I think I got some dust in my eyes while reading it.
“I’m Pacman Jones n****, what the [expletive] I got on me?”
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#11
I read Bengals will win superbowl. I'm in..
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#12
Can't argue with the science behind this story.

Can you save me hours of watching Oak Island? Will they find treasure?
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#13
God Bless Mom
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#14
(11-30-2022, 12:54 AM)THE PISTONS Wrote: Can't argue with the science behind this story.

Can you save me hours of watching Oak Island? Will they find treasure?

Made me chuckle.  I am way behind on watching, but I do enjoy that show.  
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