Steeler Fan Death (almost)

[HarleyDog]

My wife and I walk into a cozy little bar in New Paris, OH yesterday to try a pizza she had heard about at work. As I look at the menu, the specialty pizza looked very good in the picture, so was worth a try. We ordered the pizza, Mich-Ultra for her and a tall Bud Light draft for myself. As the beer was delivered, it was really cold, just how I liked it. So I think to myself, I'm glad we came here. Then the door opens.

As a dark figure emerges from the light glaring through the door, an elderly gentleman appears and walks past me, then sets 2 seats down from my wife at the bar. As he sits, a belligerent slur bellows out of his mouth as he proclaims loudly, "I aint here to start no trouble, but I'm Steelers fan." He then displays a tattoo on his forearm of the steeler logo. From the distance, the tattoo looked as if it had been done by a 12yr old and was disgustingly choppy and spotty (as if the colors blotched and faded in many areas).

My wife glances at me with a smirk, and I back at her. I whispered to her, "Watch this." So with a full intention of being interactive and not offensive, I approached the man and pulled up my sleeve and said, "I aint here to offend anyone, but I'm a Bengals fan!" He looks at my tattoo for a second and I walk away. He then begins to yell at my back while I'm walking away from him. "Do you know how many super bowls the steelers have won? Six! Six super bowls!" At this time, the man begins to choke. He grasps his neck and his face started turning purple.

As the man struggles to get air, my wife calmly looks at me and I back at her. Both of us knowing I know how to do the Heimlich and CPR. However, as the man turns his last shade of purple, he leans forward and falls to the floor. I began to arise from my seat and then something held me back. A small voice said, "just leave him alone." So I did, and there he laid.

As the swinging door to the kitchen springs open,here is the waitress with our pizza. As she sits it in front of us, I fallout of my daydream and there is the old man enjoying his beer at the end of the bar. My wife leans to me and says, man, steeler fans are very annoying. So my response to her was, "Yes they are. They seem to live in the past. But if you was to ask the man which team in the NFL they feared the most? He would say, Cincinnati Bengals!" We both chuckled a bit and enjoyed our dinner.

[6andcounting]

[JS-Steelerfan]

(09-11-2016, 11:18 AM)HarleyDog Wrote: My wife and I walk into a cozy little bar in New Paris, OH yesterday to try a pizza she had heard about at work. As I look at the menu, the specialty pizza looked very good in the picture, so was worth a try. We ordered the pizza, Mich-Ultra for her and a tall Bud Light draft for myself. As the beer was delivered, it was really cold, just how I liked it. So I think to myself, I'm glad we came here. Then the door opens.

As a dark figure emerges from the light glaring through the door, an elderly gentleman appears and walks past me, then sets 2 seats down from my wife at the bar. As he sits, a belligerent slur bellows out of his mouth as he proclaims loudly, "I aint here to start no trouble, but I'm Steelers fan." He then displays a tattoo on his forearm of the steeler logo. From the distance, the tattoo looked as if it had been done by a 12yr old and was disgustingly choppy and spotty (as if the colors blotched and faded in many areas).

My wife glances at me with a smirk, and I back at her. I whispered to her, "Watch this." So with a full intention of being interactive and not offensive, I approached the man and pulled up my sleeve and said, "I aint here to offend anyone, but I'm a Bengals fan!" He looks at my tattoo for a second and I walk away. He then begins to yell at my back while I'm walking away from him. "Do you know how many super bowls the steelers have won? Six! Six super bowls!" At this time, the man begins to choke. He grasps his neck and his face started turning purple.

As the man struggles to get air, my wife calmly looks at me and I back at her. Both of us knowing I know how to do the Heimlich and CPR. However, as the man turns his last shade of purple, he leans forward and falls to the floor. I began to arise from my seat and then something held me back. A small voice said, "just leave him alone." So I did, and there he laid.

As the swinging door to the kitchen springs open,here is the waitress with our pizza. As she sits it in front of us, I fallout of my daydream and there is the old man enjoying his beer at the end of the bar. My wife leans to me and says, man, steeler fans are very annoying. So my response to her was, "Yes they are. They seem to live in the past. But if you was to ask the man which team in the NFL they feared the most? He would say, Cincinnati Bengals!" We both chuckled a bit and enjoyed our dinner.

[StoneTheCrow]

(09-11-2016, 11:31 AM)6andcounting Wrote:

Not entirely sure why, but this made me lol. 


How was the pizza?

[StrictlyBiz]

TLDR

[StoneTheCrow]

(09-11-2016, 02:21 PM)StrictlyBiz Wrote: TLDR

Cliff notes: It was probably you. 

[HarleyDog]

(09-11-2016, 01:04 PM)StoneTheCrow Wrote: Not entirely sure why, but this made me lol. 


How was the pizza?

Pizza was awesome. Beer was ice cold. Perfect!

[StoneTheCrow]

(09-11-2016, 04:23 PM)HarleyDog Wrote: Pizza was awesome. Beer was ice cold. Perfect!

There's never been a situation that involves a steelers fan that could be described as perfect. Even if everything goes perfect there's still a steelers fan there. 

[Browns Town Bengal]

(09-11-2016, 11:18 AM)HarleyDog Wrote: My wife and I walk into a cozy little bar in New Paris, OH yesterday to try a pizza she had heard about at work. As I look at the menu, the specialty pizza looked very good in the picture, so was worth a try. We ordered the pizza, Mich-Ultra for her and a tall Bud Light draft for myself. As the beer was delivered, it was really cold, just how I liked it. So I think to myself, I'm glad we came here. Then the door opens.

As a dark figure emerges from the light glaring through the door, an elderly gentleman appears and walks past me, then sets 2 seats down from my wife at the bar. As he sits, a belligerent slur bellows out of his mouth as he proclaims loudly, "I aint here to start no trouble, but I'm Steelers fan." He then displays a tattoo on his forearm of the steeler logo. From the distance, the tattoo looked as if it had been done by a 12yr old and was disgustingly choppy and spotty (as if the colors blotched and faded in many areas).

My wife glances at me with a smirk, and I back at her. I whispered to her, "Watch this." So with a full intention of being interactive and not offensive, I approached the man and pulled up my sleeve and said, "I aint here to offend anyone, but I'm a Bengals fan!" He looks at my tattoo for a second and I walk away. He then begins to yell at my back while I'm walking away from him. "Do you know how many super bowls the steelers have won? Six! Six super bowls!" At this time, the man begins to choke. He grasps his neck and his face started turning purple.

As the man struggles to get air, my wife calmly looks at me and I back at her. Both of us knowing I know how to do the Heimlich and CPR. However, as the man turns his last shade of purple, he leans forward and falls to the floor. I began to arise from my seat and then something held me back. A small voice said, "just leave him alone." So I did, and there he laid.

As the swinging door to the kitchen springs open,here is the waitress with our pizza. As she sits it in front of us, I fallout of my daydream and there is the old man enjoying his beer at the end of the bar. My wife leans to me and says, man, steeler fans are very annoying. So my response to her was, "Yes they are. They seem to live in the past. But if you was to ask the man which team in the NFL they feared the most? He would say, Cincinnati Bengals!" We both chuckled a bit and enjoyed our dinner.

You lost me once I read bud light

[JS-Steelerfan]

(09-11-2016, 06:11 PM)Browns Town Bengal Wrote: You lost me once I read bud light

And a tall one at that.  

[yellowxdiscipline]

The real question is why the hell were you in a shit hole like New Paris? I grew up ten minutes away from that place and there is nothing there.

[Cure4CF]

(09-12-2016, 12:34 PM)yellowxdiscipline Wrote: The real question is why the hell were you in a shit hole like New Paris? I grew up ten minutes away from that place and there is nothing there.

Natural Springs Resort.  Went camping up there this year and had a pretty good time.  Didn't really see anything else up that way but didn't really leave the campground.

[HarleyDog]

(09-12-2016, 12:34 PM)yellowxdiscipline Wrote: The real question is why the hell were you in a shit hole like New Paris? I grew up ten minutes away from that place and there is nothing there.

For Pizza. Damn good pizza and cold beer. The town? Meh, wouldn't live there nor is it eye catching at all.

[ballsofsteel]

(09-11-2016, 11:18 AM)HarleyDog Wrote: My wife and I walk into a cozy little bar in New Paris, OH yesterday to try a pizza she had heard about at work. As I look at the menu, the specialty pizza looked very good in the picture, so was worth a try. We ordered the pizza, Mich-Ultra for her and a tall Bud Light draft for myself. As the beer was delivered, it was really cold, just how I liked it. So I think to myself, I'm glad we came here. Then the door opens.

As a dark figure emerges from the light glaring through the door, an elderly gentleman appears and walks past me, then sets 2 seats down from my wife at the bar. As he sits, a belligerent slur bellows out of his mouth as he proclaims loudly, "I aint here to start no trouble, but I'm Steelers fan." He then displays a tattoo on his forearm of the steeler logo. From the distance, the tattoo looked as if it had been done by a 12yr old and was disgustingly choppy and spotty (as if the colors blotched and faded in many areas).

My wife glances at me with a smirk, and I back at her. I whispered to her, "Watch this." So with a full intention of being interactive and not offensive, I approached the man and pulled up my sleeve and said, "I aint here to offend anyone, but I'm a Bengals fan!" He looks at my tattoo for a second and I walk away. He then begins to yell at my back while I'm walking away from him. "Do you know how many super bowls the steelers have won? Six! Six super bowls!" At this time, the man begins to choke. He grasps his neck and his face started turning purple.

As the man struggles to get air, my wife calmly looks at me and I back at her. Both of us knowing I know how to do the Heimlich and CPR. However, as the man turns his last shade of purple, he leans forward and falls to the floor. I began to arise from my seat and then something held me back. A small voice said, "just leave him alone." So I did, and there he laid.

As the swinging door to the kitchen springs open,here is the waitress with our pizza. As she sits it in front of us, I fallout of my daydream and there is the old man enjoying his beer at the end of the bar. My wife leans to me and says, man, steeler fans are very annoying. So my response to her was, "Yes they are. They seem to live in the past. But if you was to ask the man which team in the NFL they feared the most? He would say, Cincinnati Bengals!" We both chuckled a bit and enjoyed our dinner.

Bet you send in letters to Penthouse too.

[yellowxdiscipline]

(09-12-2016, 10:48 PM)HarleyDog Wrote: For Pizza. Damn good pizza and cold beer. The town? Meh, wouldn't live there nor is it eye catching at all.

New Paris is more known for its meth addicts then its pizza.

[The Real Deal]

(09-13-2016, 02:30 PM)yellowxdiscipline Wrote: New Paris is more known for its meth addicts then its pizza.

So are you saying its meth addicts 1st THEN pizza is a close 2nd?

[*rfaulk34*]

(09-13-2016, 07:32 AM)ballsofsteel Wrote: Bet you send in letters to Penthouse too.

I am immensely disappointed that you didn't put a Deliverance reference in this post.

[yellowxdiscipline]

(09-13-2016, 05:55 PM)The Real Deal Wrote: So are you saying its meth addicts 1st THEN pizza is a close 2nd?

I honestly don't even remember a pizza place being in New Paris, I knew there was a Subway at one point.


Most Preble County residents are fully aware of the lake there, but most of us opt for the one in Hueston Woods.

[Sabretooth]

This story was much superior to hobbs' poorly crafted drivel on that place that abandoned us fans

[ballsofsteel]

(09-13-2016, 09:38 PM)rfaulk34 Wrote: I am immensely disappointed that you didn't put a Deliverance reference in this post.

Here you go.