How Do I Tell People To Back Off?

[BFritz21]

(07-01-2021, 09:47 AM)Wes Mantooth Wrote: You could go with the direct approach: "I'm sorry, but I'd like to be left alone please."

I'd feel like too big of a dick.  

I maybe could say "you mind if I eat this before it gets cold?"  It did get cold, so that would have been a good one.

(07-01-2021, 09:47 AM)Wes Mantooth Wrote: But it might be easier just to be a bit more gentle with an excuse that still tells them the same: "I'm sorry, I'm not feeling all that well today.  It was nice meeting you though." 

He was sitting next to me so I don't think that would have worked because he would have just kept talking.  

I did try to start eating and that's when he picked up my knife and tried to cut and I started flipping out (not too bad but I grabbed the knife and just said that I was too freaked because of Covid).

(07-01-2021, 09:47 AM)Wes Mantooth Wrote: Or, at least right now, you could use the Covid excuse:  "Nice to meet you, sir.  But my immune system is compromised.  I'm really not even supposed to be here.  Please keep a distance."

He was so into his story that I really didn't have a chance to even type much of anything.  The workers were laughing and made jokes when he went to the bathroom because they could tell that I was in hell.

(07-01-2021, 09:47 AM)Wes Mantooth Wrote: Or, maybe better than any of them, be a dick about it:  "Can you please back the **** up off me.  I'm trying to watch the damn game."  I mean, what's he going to do, hit you?  And what do you risk by pissing him off?  Losing a future friend, or his riveting conversation?

With how fragile and emotional this guy was, I couldn't do that.

What I could lose is he could tell people that I was a dick and word spreads in Northern Kentucky worse than high school gossip.  

(07-01-2021, 10:06 AM)grampahol Wrote: There are so many ways to deal with this it defies numbers, but the easiest is to simply ignore him or just pick up and move to another table. 
Still, there's no crime in just telling the guy to back off plain and simple. I've never been too shy to tell someone I'm not interested. Not everyone is interested in every boring story. 
Even so, sitting in a bar is a recipe for getting your ear bent by someone who wants to go on and on and on about what amounts to nothing. I've been in both places, the ear bender as well as ear bendee. It's just one of the many many MANY reasons I don't waste my time in bars anymore..oh..and I quit drinking alcohol so win/win..  

It was Wings & Rings, so not technically a bar, and I almost sat at a table but it was pretty packed with families so I didn't want to occupy a four-person table just for me.  

(07-01-2021, 10:30 AM)Stewy Wrote: Sir (or name).  It has been good talking to you, and I don't want to be rude, but I'm not feeling very social this evening and just want to relax with the game and my meal.  Again i apologize, but I don't feel like talking to people tonight.  Have a good evening.

and ignore him.

if he persists, then either remind him you don't wish to talk or move tables.

At one point, I think I did say "I need to eat before this gets cold," but he kept talking and then tried to cut up my boneless wings.

(07-01-2021, 11:47 AM)WeezyBengal Wrote: I take this approach:

If its not someone im interested in, I came to the realization that I will most likely never see or talk to them again in my life after the current encounter. It sucks to be rude to people, but just say "Can you please leave me alone?". That's all you need to say.

Now if its a co worker or a family member or friend then obviously I wouldnt take that approach, but a complete stranger? We'll see ya...

My name's too big around here, especially with this calendar and waving to cars.

(07-01-2021, 01:39 PM)Sled21 Wrote: Tell him you like girls.....

I really don't think it would have mattered because this dude was giving off Sandusky vibes..........

(07-01-2021, 03:29 PM)michaelsean Wrote: I'd have been cool letting someone let something out because they thought I might understand...until he cut my meat for me.  I mean wtf?

Exactly.

And there's just a point because then he also started going into how he was divorced.