05-09-2019, 03:56 PM
(05-09-2019, 03:40 PM)NKURyan Wrote: I remember feeling completely shell shocked after that game. I remember feeling awful. I remember thinking that it was probably the worst I'd ever feel as a fan. Then January 2015 came along.
2015 will always sting more, IMO, for that small fraction of time where the Bengals had finally taken the lead and we all finally, finally, FINALLY thought that elusive postseason win was ours. When Burfict picked off that pass and ran down the tunnel, PBS was euphoric. Pure, unmatched joy. Fans were hugging each other and jumping into complete strangers' arms. Our moment had come against our most hated of rivals, but then... snatched away. Absolutely devastating.
The only time I ever cried over the Bengals was after the 2005 playoff game. Mind you, I didn’t break down and sob. I got in the shower at halftime for meditation and washing sweat off (I spent the afternoon skiing). And it just happened. I leaned my hand up against the shower wall, my head in the shower stream, and just stood there and cried. I remember the initial reports on the knee injury were “potentially career ending”. Carson had just signed essentially a lifetime deal with the Bengals. It all came crashing down in one fell swoop. I thought he was done. I thought the team was done. I thought they would become the Bungles of old without Carson. All the excitement that season brought, all the hope for the future... all seemed like it was over in just a second. It was brutal...
That’s why 2005 will always be worse for me. It hurt more. A lot more. When they completely blew it against Pittsburgh in 2015 there was a small amount of sick satisfaction. It was kinda like... “of course. This team has no composure. No discipline. And they once again blew a game on national television the only way the Bengals can”. They didn’t deserve to win. Burfict and Pac-Man didn’t deserve to win. I was sick, I was pissed. But after all that happened I happily said f*** this team of punks. This team of choke artists. And nothing changed afterwards, like I knew it wouldn’t. No accountability, no reprimanding, nothing. Business as usual
The 2005 bengals team deserved to win. They weren’t known nationwide as a team full of criminals. They certainly weren’t dirty. They were a young, up-and-coming team that mostly everyone around the country was happy to see climb out of the cellar. The 2015 team was perceived as a team full of criminals (unfair) and dirty players (somewhat fair... just Burfict). They weren’t well-liked nationwide. People expected them to choke. And they did. They blew it in the most embarrassing way possible.
I felt nothing but anger and embarrassment after 2015. I felt nothing but heartache and despair after 2005
