Apathy

[THE Bigzoman]

Okay, i'm going to open up.

What has and will keep me faithfully watching this team is one simple fact: I'm them and they are me.

Let me explain.

Rewind back into 2010-2011. I don't think I have to give anyone here a history lesson about what took place for the team that year, so i'll go straight to what I was going through at that same time.

I graduated HS but was lost. Had low self esteem, was insecure, and had no direction in my life. Looking back at it now, I guess that a childhood of being socially awkward and on the outside does that to you. I ended up enrolling at a community college and took a few remedial course since I never bothered to apply myself.

Drift more towards 2011 and things started to look up for me. I surrounded myself with positive influences and people at my community college that told me I had a lot of talent and could do big things. At that same time, the Dalton/Green era was just about to kick off. Hell, my academic advisor/best friend was essentially the latino version of Marvin Lewis--Stoic, straight edged and stubborn.

Fast forward many years later. Again, I don't think I have to remind anyone of the talent the Bengals amassed and how joyful it was to watch them get into the playoffs. so back to me. With Latino Marvin's guidance, I passed my remedials, passed higher tier classes, and transferred to a 4 year university on a full ride scholarship.

But like the Bengals, when the big moment came, whether it was interviews for corporate jobs, academic competitions, etc, I shrunk. I was the Bengals in my academic department--mediocre and always beaten out by top tier students for the honors stuff (Steelers, Patriots, Broncos , etc.)

And now, here I am, graduated and admittingly not in the best spot economically. And here are the Bengals, who, like me, can't get over the hump.

What keeps me drawn to this team is my similarity to them in this respect. I know what it's like to come oh so close only to kick myself in the teeth/make a mistake; I know what it's like to be considered a real-life "bungle" and how to somewhat climb out of that perception; I know the frustration of laying an egg when things matter most.

Will I climb to greater heights? Who knows. Will the Bengals get over the hump? Again, who knows. All I know is that as long as they keep trying, so will I. Because if they can do it, then so can I.

Then again, I could just be crazy for having this kind of attachment to a shit franchise. Who knows?

[*Go Cards*]

Probably will keep them but am seriously contemplating giving up my season tickets after this season.

Or selling them for a profit. It saddens me to even think like this. But am at a crossroad with the Bengals right now.

Hopefully they make changes for the better to rejuvenate my homerism.

Will always be a Bengals fan through thick and thin though.

[xxlt]

(12-20-2016, 12:04 PM)OrlandoBengal Wrote: I chose "apathy" as the title for the thread because it best describes my feelings towards this organization.  I can't think of a time that I have been more so since the pre Carson Palmer days.  I still enjoy watching the sport, but have become numb to Mike Brown and Marvin Lewis.  I'm not watching the majority of games and am extremely less active on here than I used to be.

I know the standard thought process is that I will get excited once the draft comes around, but something feels different about this year.  I also know this is going to elicit many of the "you're not a real fan", "go root for Cleveland" responses that are typical on this board.  I'm just curious how many others are feeling this way or something similar?  Maybe my time as a Bengals fan is winding down...

I feel the same way. I don't look forward to Sundays any more and often don't even watch the game. I found myself able to watch second half of Pittsburgh game but knowing we would lose I was more interested in watching other games and listening to my buddy ***** about how poorly Pittsburgh played and assuring him they would win anyway. I was mildly curious about how we got the lead, and how exactly we would lose, but there was never a doubt in my mind we would lose. It is like this season was over before it started. 

[xxlt]

(12-20-2016, 02:39 PM)grampahol Wrote: I've become apathetic towards football in general along with all the other sports. My body is too old and sore to play any of them so all that's really left is watching other people that I have almost nothing in common with play a game that doesn't really effect my life one way or another. 

If they lose it only bums me out and if they win it just bums me out slightly less than losing.
I no longer believe there's any inherent fairness to these games as more and more they feel rigged much like the political process. It almost feels like that any time now a law will be passed that prohibits us from actually cheering on whatever team we happen to like and we'll be forced cheer on teams we dislike.. I doubt that happens, but it feels like it might someday..
When fans become so rude to each other over issues we have zero control over it feels rather pointless to even bother caring one way or another. Folks act as if by keeping certain players on the team it's a personal slap to their very existence as a human being and team owners are these untouchably super rich entities that really have no connection with the towns they allegedly represent and the vast majority of players are kind of the same way. 
We debate why "we" pay so much to certain players. On guy is paid 50 million while another league minimum which is still far more than most of us will ever see in ten years of hard work and we get all pissy because "we" don't pay them enough to do what? Entertain us for an hour once a week? AND WE ARGUE about this.. 
Hey, as far as I'm concerned if the person at the drive-through window at McDonald's gets your order right and you don't have to wait more than a few minutes they deserve just as much money as the guy who sits on the bench all season, but instead they're paid barely anything.. The way I see it the 3rd string quarterback ought to be getting my fries ready on time if he's going to be paid almost half a million dollars a year.. That's the very least he can do for us for that kind of money..
Yeah..I don't really care all that much if they lose 16 games a season or win the super bowl 5 years in a row. The results in my life are approximately the same.. 
Wait..what was the question? 
Just another thought..if you truly believe that firing Marvin is the answer just think about the WONDERFUL results the Browns have had by firing head coaches over the years. That's been a rip roaring success. 

Man, there is a lot of truth in that post. Well done. 

[*bengalfan74*]

I can't stop being a Bengals Fan. Was here well before Mikey took over.

But I can't continue on with Marvin Lewis, I've seen enough. If Marvin is retained and we continue on with the same old same old I'm out until it ends.

[Earendil]

(12-21-2016, 09:35 AM)bengalfan74 Wrote: I can't stop being a Bengals Fan. Was here well before Mikey took over.

But I can't continue on with Marvin Lewis, I've seen enough. If Marvin is retained and we continue on with the same old same old I'm out until it ends.

Yeah, that's pretty much how I feel.  I'm fortunate enough to live in a part of the country that doesn't get many Bengals games, and to also not have cable.  But I can't even bring myself to do more than check the score a couple of times before the game is over.  In a lot of cases this year, I haven't even checked until later that night.