Like not the conventional stuff. My friends and family are giving me plenty of the by them books info.

I’m talking stuff you only learn from having multiple kids. I never even held a baby before my daughter so that gives you a baseline idea of my prior knowledge.

Fire away



I’m doing fine now but my wife is admittedly doing 90% of the work.

CONGRATS!


I have no advice. Just happy that a person of your character has multiplied their genes. Best of luck. Don’t **** this up. Buy a Costco membership to offset the toilet paper bill.

I'll never have kids, but many of my friends do - and I obeserve from the outside. Not that I see them much, of course. This will be your first experience, you will constantly be tired and have litttle to no free time. It gets slightly better after some time. Slightly.
Down the road, and again I say that as an outsider who just observes stuff, but it might give me some perspective. These little kids, even when still real little, are more sensitive and realize more stuff than their parents usually believe. You say something derogatory about them in front of them, they'll be aware, even if they don't understand. If you have fights in front of the kid, then the kid will turn cranky. If you're frustrated about life or anything in front of the kid, so will the kid be. And so on. It often amazes me how many parents don't seem to realize that.

This is the only original thought I can contribute. As for the thousand other important issues, I leave them to the experts.

Oh and congratulations.

Dad of 2. 3.5 year boy and 10 month girl.

I usually give the cliché advise of "the days are long but the years are short."

And while there are a lot of changes to your social life and finances, my non-cliché advice is that if it is important enough there will be time and money enough for it. And that goes for both parents and child.

Bonus advice is that don't worry about it. Plenty of dumber people than you (and me) have had kids and made it work.

(11-05-2022, 08:59 AM)CKwi88 Wrote: Dad of 2. 3.5 year boy and 10 month girl.

I usually give the cliché advise of "the days are long but the years are short."

And while there are a lot of changes to your social life and finances, my non-cliché advice is that if it is important enough there will be time and money enough for it. And that goes for both parents and child.

Bonus advice is that don't worry about it. Plenty of dumber people than you (and me) have had kids and made it work.

That 3rd like really hit me. Thank you for real

(11-05-2022, 01:32 AM)Housh Wrote: Like not the conventional stuff. My friends and family are giving me plenty of the by them books info.

I’m talking stuff you only learn from having multiple kids. I never even held a baby before my daughter so that gives you a baseline idea of my prior knowledge.

Fire away



I’m doing fine now but my wife is admittedly doing 90% of the work.

dad of 13 yr old twins here, boy and a girl
my best advice is : hold off on getting her that cell phone or access to social media until shes in 8th grade or high school. Its poison to little girls.  

Congrats on the new addition.

(11-05-2022, 11:18 AM)kalibengal Wrote: dad of 13 yr old twins here, boy and a girl
my best advice is : hold off on getting her that cell phone or access to social media until shes in 8th grade or high school. Its poison to little girls.  

My wife wants to hold out on letting them watch any TV for as long as possible too


I told her i feel like every new parent says that until they gotta entertain the kid lol


The social media one is pretty doable I’d think thi. Im definitely gonna try and keep her off that as long as possible

Spend as time with your child as much you can - they grow up FAST!

(11-05-2022, 01:53 PM)Interceptor Wrote: Spend as time with your child as much you can - they grow up FAST!

This... Like blink of an eye fast. My daughter just turned 7 on Halloween. You'll figure it out along the way Housh. They're all different. Girl dad life is where it's at.

i raised a son so dont have experince with a girl but as a parent i would just say raise them with good morals. respect for there elders. give the chores and responsibiltes so they can value hard work an accomplishment an the benefits of earning stuff on there own. an keep God an his teachings in there hearts an how to give back to there communtiy. all those things will lead to the child growing up to be a good person with good values.

Congratulations! That's awesome. I've got 4 daughters (13, 11, 10 and 8). Time goes by fast as others have said. Your time (availability) and time with the kiddos. No matter how exhausting it is, trying to remember these are years you'll never get back tends to help me put things in perspective when I'm dying for some "me" time, don't want to read that story again, just want to watch the game in peace, etc.

The other thing with girls especially is making sure they know how loved they are. From day one. You don't have to be (and probably shouldn't be) your kid's friend. But you should be there to listen to them, to let them know you're always there (and then actually be there) and build them up. Social media is such a terrible thing because of the way it makes people feel like they're not enough, not perfect, not loved. Give your daughter that foundation and she's less likely to seek that validation from strangers (or bad boyfriends). Love and respect go so far.

But at the end of the day? Have fun with it! Parenting is an adventure. You can't do anything to make your kids' lives "perfect", or have them turn out "perfectly", so just embrace the mess and the struggle and find something each day to laugh or at least smile about. You'll be a great dad.

(11-08-2022, 03:42 PM)Leon Wrote: i raised a son so dont have experince with a girl but as a parent i would just say raise them with good morals. respect for there elders. give the chores and responsibiltes so they can value hard work an accomplishment an the benefits of earning stuff on there own. an keep God an his teachings in there hearts an how to give back to there communtiy. all those things will lead to the child growing up to be a good person with good values.

Rep

Crack the window when you leave her in the hot weather.

When you smoke around her, wave your hand in front of her face to help disperse the smoke

When she cries in her crib; soak her pacifier in bourbon

When you spank her do so with a utensil instead of your hand; she must not associate your hand with pain

Congratulations. I’ll try to add a couple things here. Always make a little time for her. She needs to know she can come to you for advice or an ear to listen to her. As others have, watch the social media use and who she sees as role models.

While she’s very little cherish every time you get yo hold her in your arms or sit on your lap as she gets a little older. They grow up fast and before you know it she’s hanging out with friends and trying not to be daddy’s little girl. And trust your gut on her friends. If something feels off about one of them don’t be hesitant to cut them out


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Just enjoy them and give them real values not tied to any political nonsense. They'll have plenty of time for the later. Girls are a lot easier to potty train..just wave frilly underwear at them. Boys? Not so much. They have to be trained to aim, stop, start, etc. 
Daughters are easier by far than boys to raise and usually a lot prettier as they grow up. 

(11-05-2022, 01:32 AM)Housh Wrote: Like not the conventional stuff. My friends and family are giving me plenty of the by them books info.

I’m talking stuff you only learn from having multiple kids. I never even held a baby before my daughter so that gives you a baseline idea of my prior knowledge.

Fire away



I’m doing fine now but my wife is admittedly doing 90% of the work.

Invest in this when she becomes a teenager and boys knock at your door...

Congrats Housh. No advice as I haven't had any kids yet. Have a niece and she is a fun bugger.

Just heard girls are more expensive than boys so save up some dough is my only advice.

(11-22-2022, 12:36 PM)BengalYankee Wrote: Invest in this when she becomes a teenager and boys knock at your door...

You forgot the shovel.

I have two daughters and baby girls are awesome. They’ll love everything you do and pay attention to all you say so enjoy it while you can because when they hit 12 or 13 they’ll start treating you like poop. You’ll hear the snark, see the eye rolls, and hold your tongue when you want to lash out.

Enjoy the cuddles and kisses while they last. Savor the memories of holding her hand and walking together. Remember homework help time is quality time.