*** JN POST HOF ***

[Bengalholic]

Wyche on Andy's stats improving during the season...

(11-21-2017, 10:37 AM)Wyche Wrote: He's being elevated by the great pass blocking, Brandon Lafell, Joe Mixon's 1.2 YPC, Boyd/Core/Malone/whoever else the **** they decide on this week, the defense's stellar ability to get off the field on 3rd down lately, Kroft/Uzomah/Carter, and fat Randy and the rest of the excellent special teams play we've seen this season.  

How can you not see this?

[Shake n Blake]

Quote:BengalsRocker Wrote:

I hear the Steelers comin', they're rollin' round the bend.

And I ain't seen a playoff win since I don't know when.

Quote:HarleyDog Wrote:

We're stuck in Cincinnati, and time keeps dragging on
As those losses keep compiling, all my hopes are gone

Well when I was just a baby my mama told me son
If you root for Cincinnati our relationship is done
Then Burfict tackled Bell,  just to watch him die
When I see them flags a flyin' I hang my head and I cry

Well I'll bet rich Mikies eatin' in some fancy dining car
Probably counting all his money and smokin' big cigars
Well I know I had it comin' I know I can't be free
That bastard keeps a breathing' that's what tortures me

http://thebengalsboard.com/Thread-Here-are-some-interesting-stats-for-ya-Son-of-Paul?pid=476107#pid476107

[*Wyche'sWarrior*]

Stone the Crow sums it up beautifully.....

http://thebengalsboard.com/Thread-BREAKING-A-NEW-injury-ends-John-Ross-season?pid=480747#pid480747

Quote:Fire everyone, burn down Paul Brown Stadium, bulldoze the ashes into the river, pray for anyone downstream who comes into contact with the ashes.

[*Wyche'sWarrior*]

......and a beaut from SHRacer on John Ross to IR:

http://thebengalsboard.com/Thread-BREAKING-A-NEW-injury-ends-John-Ross-season?pid=481016#pid481016

Quote:Well, this is like when you have diarrhea and you just keep wiping your ass and there just seems to be an endless amount of shit.  That is this season.  

[Bengal Dude]

(12-12-2017, 02:31 PM)Bengalholic Wrote: Marvin, is it your job to motivate your team?



Marvin, is it your job to make sure your guys are well prepared?



Marvin, is it your job to make sure schematic changes are made if they're not working?



Marvin, is it your job to ensure second half adjustments are made?



Marvin, is it your job to take responsibility for the failings of your staff?



Marvin, are you held accountable in any way by management?

[*rfaulk34*]

(12-29-2017, 12:28 AM)McC Wrote: Because that's our history.  It's written in our DNA.

We are a maddening combination of horrible luck and bad decisions.  When the right decisions are made and things are seemingly in place, fate steps in and pisses on the fire.  

We defy logic.  We defy nature.  We are the broken clock that isn't right twice a day, the blind squirrel that doesn't find the nut.  Kicked when we're down, kicked when we're up.  We can't trust the good times because we have been there before and we know what is coming.

If you put this history into a work of fiction, it would scoffed at for being beyond belief.

What Bengal fan truly believes the Bengals will ever win a SB?   And yet, here we are and here we'll stay.

True story.

[*rfaulk34*]

(01-08-2018, 07:44 PM)McC Wrote: Seems like Marv already had his mind made up and the interview was more of a formality.  Who did they interview when they gave Paulie the job?

(01-08-2018, 07:44 PM)StoneTheCrow Wrote: Plane tickets don’t grow on trees bro.

Bingo!

[*SHRacerX*]

From The Leonard Leap: (regarding AJ Green not being shown as a "star" at the NCAA Championship game"

They were about to cut over to him and Atkins, but the hot dog guy handed Atkins' hotdogs to AJ to pass them over.... and he dropped them. Ninja

[*SHRacerX*]

From Shake N' Blake:

Shouldamapads Wrote:
I present the - Go Choke on a Bone awards sponsored by Olde English 800- why drink expensive, when it tastes the same after one anyhow and you're really overdue for a good blackout?

Awards for the worst in class in contributions, humor and reality.


Worst Jungle Noise Poster - Me. I seriously don't know how you guys tolerate me.
Worst of all the other boards that I never visit on here Poster: The other forums are awful and I avoid them.
Creepiest Member Signature - Idk about sig, but that Burfict/Andy face mix avatar is hideous.
TMI in signature poster- Me again. A list of Andy stats with every post? Ugh.

Lamest Poster - Anyone who says "dilly dilly". Was that ever funny?
Biggest Troll- Shrek? Oh wait...he's an ogre.
Most Clueless on facts Poster - Jim O. Insider my butt.
Most Off-the-wall Poster (In a bad way) - BenZoo's posts never make sense. It's sad.
Clearly delusional poster- Aren't we all Bengals fans?
Never on topic Poster- TJ Houshmandzadeh is so underrated among fans. Loved that guy.

Most inappropriate Poster - Shouldamapads. That dude has no manners.
Most incoherent Poster - Kevin. He puts way too many spaces in his posts.
Clearly sauced or high Poster - Holic. He really has a problem. If only you guys could see all of his deleted posts.
If killing was legal, I'd snipe this poster - If I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise, now would it?


Overall worst contributor: Truck. Who does that guy think he is, anyway?

Answers in bold, and the banhammer is aimed at OP. Ninja

[Nicomo Cosca]

Fan in Kettering response to have you seen the defense without Butfict?

“Yes. It’s like a horror movie where everyone makes bad decisions.”

[*SHRacerX*]

From Sunset Bengal:  

fredtoast Wrote:

I think this offseason will be like 2011 when we rebuilt our defense through free agency, except this year it will be the offense.



Now I will admit that we only signed one free agent that was more than a bargain basement project (Nate Clements 2yr $10.5 million), but that is still one more than usual.  Then we signed two free agent LBs who were *gasp* less than 30 years old (27 yr old Manny Lawson 1 yr $3 million, 28 yr old Thomas Howard 2 yr $6.5 million).  And even though we failed to sign Donte Whitner the fact that we made an offer that he almost accepted before taking 3 yr $12 million from the Fort Niners proves that we were TRYING.



That was also tyhe same offseason that we replaced our Offensive Coordinator Bob "Blue Eyes" Bratkowski with Jay Gruden.



Some people around here act like the Bengals never make these kind of moves, but this was just 8 years ago.  And our offense last year was the worst it has been since 2008 when Palmer was out with injury.



I agree that the Bengals don't operate like this very often, but it has been a long time since we had an offense as bad as last year.  So I think they will loosen the purse strings in free agency this year.


From Sunset:







Wait, you can't make that prediction.  You have zero evidence to back it up.



Why would you just make up silly predictions like that, out of thin air?  What are your credentials to be making absurd predictions like that?  Are you a certifiable football prediction expert?  If so, you need to validate that claim. Ninja




You reap what you sew, eh? 

[treee]

TKHUL on Burfict:

Quote:Maybe it's a good thing his name is JuJu cause that's the only word he might be able to pronounce correct when Burficts done with him.

[firstand10]

No Comment!

[HarleyDog]

Quote:XsandOs

An article written by a nobody in a no name site, means nothing.

Character? Has Burfict been accused of sexual assault, murder or any crime of moral turpitude?

If we are talking aggression on the field of play, I ask you to consider that every single Pittsburgh SB trophy is built on Roid Rage. NFL players and Pitt's own players state that they started the steroid culture in NFL.


They stopped for one decade (1980s) and were the bottom feeders of NFL. Cowher started it back again in 1990s and they became competitive. Their team Physician was convicted of peddling anabolics and HGH.

Pitt is a dirty organization with dirty players and coaches. Ever wonder why Cowher no longer coaches in NFL? Why does a player who has been accused of sexual assault more than once, is still their starting QB?

Grand Slam! 

[*rfaulk34*]

Kevin's thoughts on jwayne drama.

(09-26-2018, 03:35 AM)kevin Wrote: OK, you say you are 62 +.  I don't know what that means.  I am 63.  I would not say I am 63 +.   When I was a kid I might have said I was 4 and a half years old. You reach a point when you stop doing that by first grade. I've never heard anybody say they are 62 plus.  Another area you lost me is you say you can't bite on the fish they sold on Sunday. I watched the game, I didn't see them selling no fish.  I saw them playing football. I guess that is some kind of old man slang, but I've never heard it and I'm just as old as your are.  You can't bite on the fish they sold. The fish they sold, you can't bite on. Well, maybe if you put your teeth back in your mouth. See, when you get our age, you gotta' put your teeth in your mouth.   You go on to talk about the Bills game, what's that have to do with Bengals ?   You say don't try to sell you on Brown, but you also say you can't bite on the fish, that was sold, on Sunday ???  Then you say you are out of here, Good Bye, but then you say LIKELY your last post. What, don't you know ?  Are you Jimmy Durante ?  Have you ever had the feeling that you wanted to go, then you got the feeling that you wanted to stay. Go, stay, go, stay.  Or shades of Groucho Marx, Hello I must be going.  Then you tell us to ef off and die, as you call us Bengals Fans.  Well, you know what, I am a Bengals Fan. It's kind of why I even go on Bengals Boards and the old closed Bengals.com Jungle Noise.  I don't know why people who aren't Bengals Fans even go on these sites. To me, going on a site you don't like is like eating the fish you can't bite on,that was sold on Sunday. it makes no sense.   So, being 62 +, you the know the Lawrence Welk ending of Adios, Au Revoir, Auf Wiedersehen, Good Night and then Lawrence Welk dressed like The Terminator says Hasta La Vista, Baby.  Then comes the bubble machine.   I have to add  LOL, which I try to not use. When you say I AM DONE, and then add, LIKELY MY LAST POST. to me that is a LOL.  So good bye forever, Maybe.  Either way, watch out for those brown fish you aren't buying, that you can't bite on at 62 +.  I think you are going to miss a good Bengals season, but as you say, we are Bengals Fans, and you are not.

The bolded makes me spit coffee out my nose every time.

[Hoofhearted]

(09-26-2018, 10:56 AM)rfaulk34 Wrote: Kevin's thoughts on jwayne drama.


The bolded makes me spit coffee out my nose every time.

Honestly, we should move that entire thread in here. 

[*rfaulk34*]

And...the Yang to his Yin...

(09-26-2018, 11:12 AM)Tiger Teeth Wrote: I just want to give a nod to all the real fans that are sticking around. I am 54+ years old, and I love to bite fish. I'm not sure what that means, but that isn't important.

I love football, and watching NFL games is something I plan on doing whether Bengal linebackers hit the hole or not.    

To anyone who jumps ship and is done with football at this point in the season, I suggest you take up knitting.  And for any of you bums who are rude, you can K.M.A.  (Kiss my ass.)  

This is likely NOT my last post.  WHO DEY!

LOL!

[*rfaulk34*]

Pure excellence.

(10-02-2018, 03:35 PM)HarleyDog Wrote: While driving through Pittsburgh once after dark, I heard several loud popping and cracking sounds like I was driving over a highway fillied with acorns. Legend has it in Pittsburgh, neglected, decayed orphan teeth scour the streets and alleyways trying to find mouths to call home. Yet, only after dark.   

[*rfaulk34*]

Very deserving.

(10-18-2018, 02:48 PM)BengalHawk62 Wrote: Since most everyone has now started following my pessimistic lead, I'm going to back up and take a reverse-reverse stance this week.  Not so fast, my friend!  We smoke their asses.
We got smoked last week against our most heated and hated rival.  Who Cares?
Is Burfict a suspended ass-clown?  Who Cares?
We are down Price, Gio, Eifert...that's just on offense.  Who Cares?
Our defense sucks balls.  Who Cares?
Andy Dalton on Primetime has a crappy record.  Who Cares?
Marvin Lewis is our HC.  Who Cares?
Mike Brown is still our owner. Who Cares?



Bengals- 94

Chiefs- 31

We blow this one open in the 7th inning. Triple Crowns, Hat tricks, Grand Slams, and we have another 3 guys hitting the cycle all by the time we sing Take Me Out.  This game is going to be a rout of epic proportions. Like that movie 300, we successfully and defiantly hold off a horde of Mongols at the gates of Tripoli.  This is my For Sure, Lock it Up pick this week. 

Another one bites the dust.  We're gonna show those young whipper snapping Chefs what its like to play AFC North football. 

[*rfaulk34*]

In reply to Au165 asking, "What if everyone threw trash on his lawn?"

(12-06-2018, 06:19 PM)ochocincos Wrote: Joke's on you, he lives at the stadium. There's trash on his lawn every Sunday!  

Bingo!