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The Curse of Harambe
#1
In the 56 matches since the killing of Harambe in 2016 the Bengals are 19-36-1.

The 56 games prior to that the Bengals were 40-15-1.

It's therefore clear what has caused the Bengals' demise. What's less clear is how we can reverse the curse.

What creative solutions do you have for reversing the curse of Harambe?
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#2
(11-07-2019, 10:18 AM)TJHoushmandzadeh Wrote: In the 56 matches since the killing of Harambe in 2016 the Bengals are 19-36-1.

The 56 games prior to that the Bengals were 40-15-1.

It's therefore clear what has caused the Bengals' demise. What's less clear is how we can reverse the curse.

What creative solutions do you have for reversing the curse of Harambe?

A superfan in an orange gorilla suit at games? Or is that just an orangutan?
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#3
(11-07-2019, 10:18 AM)TJHoushmandzadeh Wrote: In the 56 matches since the killing of Harambe in 2016 the Bengals are 19-36-1.

The 56 games prior to that the Bengals were 40-15-1.

It's therefore clear what has caused the Bengals' demise. What's less clear is how we can reverse the curse.

What creative solutions do you have for reversing the curse of Harambe?




Have the Bengals start signing Real Gorillas and teaching them to play Football. 

(or have another Organization teach them how to play and then the Bengals sign them)  Tongue
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#4
(11-07-2019, 10:18 AM)TJHoushmandzadehs Shiny Shoes Wrote: In the 56 matches since the killing of Harambe in 2016 the Bengals are 19-36-1.

The 56 games prior to that the Bengals were 40-15-1.

It's therefore clear what has caused the Bengals' demise. What's less clear is how we can reverse the curse.

What creative solutions do you have for reversing the curse of Harambe?

That's an easy fix... Just sacrifice a kid to a gorilla...
I'm gonna break every record they've got. I'm tellin' you right now. I don't know how I'm gonna do it, but it's goin' to get done.

- Ja'Marr Chase 
  April 2021
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#5
Bring back the monkeys riding dogs during next home game and that will reverse the curse. Last time Horambe and me chatted, he said he liked those little midget apes. Well, there is one other way, Mike Brown has to be sacrificed at the alter of the zoo. Only way it will happen.
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#6
(11-07-2019, 02:52 PM)HarleyDog Wrote: Bring back the monkeys riding dogs during next home game and that will reverse the curse. Last time Horambe and me chatted, he said he liked those little midget apes. Well, there is one other way, Mike Brown has to be sacrificed at the alter of the zoo. Only way it will happen.




Or they can put Mike inside the Zoo exhibit area with the Alpha Gorilla and let the Gorilla hold him like a Teddy Bear until he agrees to sell the Team.  Mellow
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#7
[Image: 5146Y-sam5L._SX331_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg]

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#8
(11-07-2019, 02:52 PM)HarleyDog Wrote: Bring back the monkeys riding dogs during next home game and that will reverse the curse.

ThumbsUp

Can we have a monkey riding dog smiley to test this theory out?
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#9
I tend to agree with a previous statement that the only true way to reverse the curse is to sacrifice Mike Brown and the entire Brown/Blackburn family to gorillas related to Harambe. Then, the curse will be broken...or atleast all the Brown and Blackburn scum will be removed from the team and it will be improved.

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#10
(11-07-2019, 10:18 AM)TJHoushmandzadeh Wrote: In the 56 matches since the killing of Harambe in 2016 the Bengals are 19-36-1.

The 56 games prior to that the Bengals were 40-15-1.

It's therefore clear what has caused the Bengals' demise. What's less clear is how we can reverse the curse.

What creative solutions do you have for reversing the curse of Harambe?

Break the leg of a gorilla named Bo Jackson.  Mellow
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#11
(11-07-2019, 05:10 PM)PhilHos Wrote: Break the leg of a gorilla named Bo Jackson.  Mellow

Replace leg with "hip" and this is the one true answer. Two curses, one maiming.
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#12
(11-07-2019, 05:10 PM)PhilHos Wrote: Break the leg of a gorilla named Bo Jackson.  Mellow

I can't tell if this post is super racist or if I'm super racist for thinking it is.
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#13
And here I thought it was the curse of Jerry Springer's bad checks bouncing at PBS.
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Quote:"Success doesn’t mean every single move they make is good" ~ Anonymous 
"Let not the dumb have to educate" ~ jj22
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#14
The thing that's really troubling is that we have to create a curse as an excuse for why the Bengals can't win. Kind of like the Cubs with their Billy Goat. The only curse to this team is the Brown family.
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#15
(11-07-2019, 09:32 PM)Nately120 Wrote: I can't tell if this post is super racist or if I'm super racist for thinking it is.

I realized how it sounded when I posted it and thought maybe I should explain that I wasn't calling any human beings gorillas, but then my laziness kicked in and I thought, "aw **** it" and just left it as is.
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#16
(11-08-2019, 01:08 PM)PhilHos Wrote: I realized how it sounded when I posted it and thought maybe I should explain that I wasn't calling any human beings gorillas, but then my laziness kicked in and I thought, "aw **** it" and just left it as is.

Smart decision. If anyone complains about it at least we'll know who the snowflakes are. 
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#17
(11-08-2019, 01:25 PM)BengalRed Wrote: Smart decision. If anyone complains about it at least we'll know who the snowflakes are. 

Everyone is a snowflake...our survival as a species is paramount upon our predilection to consider ourselves exceptional and above the judgement we gleefully slather upon others.  All you snowflakes who call people snowflakes being unable to admit this is the snowflakiest thing ever.
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#18
Harambe on top of the Bo Jackson curse? We're ******!

"Better send those refunds..."

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#19
(11-07-2019, 10:18 AM)TJHoushmandzadeh Wrote: In the 56 matches since the killing of Harambe in 2016 the Bengals are 19-36-1.

The 56 games prior to that the Bengals were 40-15-1.

It's therefore clear what has caused the Bengals' demise. What's less clear is how we can reverse the curse.

What creative solutions do you have for reversing the curse of Harambe?

interesting considering the franchise's name also has origins from the zoo....

People saying sacrifice MB... but he didn't do anything to Harambe…  once real justice is served then maybe the curse will lift.
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#20
(11-08-2019, 01:47 PM)Wyche Wrote: Harambe on top of the Bo Jackson curse? We're ******!

You could add Boomer Esiason and Sam Wyche and about every player who left here on bad terms to that "curse" list.  Geez, everyone is mad at Mike Brown.
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