Super Homer time-killer thread

[GreenCornBengal]

Nate, I think we even have it better than the Patriots!

We know all patriot fans are blind to cheating so it’s safe to assume their wives are out riding anything that moves. Not to mention, the constant self hate from the realization that they will never be Tom Brady is something they secretly cry about as they fall asleep at night. With him leaving town, it’s time for them to crawl back into the hole they came out of from the pre 2000s.

Also, once Joe Burrow gets back to back .... to back to back Super Bowls, Tom Brady won’t be the GOAT anymore. Dynasty in Cincinnati!!

[*SHRacerX*]

(05-15-2020, 11:40 AM)Nicomo Cosca Wrote: This again?

Dak has the NFL record for most consecutive passes to start a career without an INT (176).  Previously held by some guy named Tom Brady...

He also reached 25 TD’s with the fewest INT’s (4) in NFL history. Are those records all his OL and RB, too? Or is he just a hell of a QB?

I know this is the bash other teams thread, but Andy Dalton is not better than Dak Prescott. He’s just not.

You can't say this definitively.  Dak is a far better athlete, but I think Dalton has the better accuracy and vision.  I just don't see him as the "hell of a QB" you make him out to be.  He has played on a ton of talent-laden teams and hasn't done anything in the post season, either.  When Dalton had a loaded team, he was an MVP candidate. 

It will be interesting to see what happens if Dak gets injured. 

[*Nate (formerly eliminate08)*]

Alright, lets look at the so called best team in our Division in the Ratbirds. The Titans shown the blueprint on how to
stop this team last year and we just added the proper players in Reader, Waynes, Alexander, Bell, Wilson, Bynes to do
it and we also took Bynes from them and pissed off a lot of their fans. We stop the run, keep Lamar in the pocket and
we can be the best team in the Division hands down cause the Stoolpitt's QB is going to keep on sucking like last year
and the Stains are the Stains and overrated just like last year.

[*Nately120*]

(05-15-2020, 03:03 PM)GreenCornBengal Wrote: Nate, I think we even have it better than the Patriots!

We know all patriot fans are blind to cheating so it’s safe to assume their wives are out riding anything that moves. Not to mention, the constant self hate from the realization that they will never be Tom Brady is something they secretly cry about as they fall asleep at night. With him leaving town, it’s time for them to crawl back into the hole they came out of from the pre 2000s.

Also, once Joe Burrow gets back to back .... to back to back Super Bowls, Tom Brady won’t be the GOAT anymore. Dynasty in Cincinnati!!

Technically we can safely cap the Patriots' SB wins at 6 for now, but there is no way to prove that Burrow and the Bengals can't win 7 or more until Burrow retires in 2039.  So we can call this one a "YES, to be proven later" for now.

[*Nately120*]

(05-15-2020, 04:24 PM)Nate (formerly eliminate08) Wrote: Alright, lets look at the so called best team in our Division in the Ratbirds. The Titans shown the blueprint on how to
stop this team last year and we just added the proper players in Reader, Waynes, Alexander, Bell, Wilson, Bynes to do
it and we also took Bynes from them and pissed off a lot of their fans. We stop the run, keep Lamar in the pocket and
we can be the best team in the Division hands down cause the Stoolpitt's QB is going to keep on sucking like last year
and the Stains are the Stains and overrated just like last year.

The Balti-LESS Turdbirds have a RB at QB and that's not going to last. Hell, if that was even a good idea the Panthers would be teaching McCaffrey to throw the ball, HA!  They've had it handed to them in the playoffs two years in a row and Marvin Lewis and Andy Dalton can tell you that flopping in the post-season isn't something that just goes away because you wish upon a star, you know?  They lost to the Chargers and the Titans in the playoffs.  Please, we are so much better than either of those two teams that beat them and that's even before Burrow suits up and puts on his jock strap.

Once Burrow puts on that jock strap the Craven Ravens are going to flop harder than me on prom night.  Bank on it.

[GreenCornBengal]

(05-15-2020, 06:09 PM)Nately120 Wrote: The Balti-LESS Turdbirds have a RB at QB and that's not going to last. Hell, if that was even a good idea the Panthers would be teaching McCaffrey to throw the ball, HA!  They've had it handed to them in the playoffs two years in a row and Marvin Lewis and Andy Dalton can tell you that flopping in the post-season isn't something that just goes away because you wish upon a star, you know?  They lost to the Chargers and the Titans in the playoffs.  Please, we are so much better than either of those two teams that beat them and that's even before Burrow suits up and puts on his jock strap.

Once Burrow puts on that jock strap the Craven Ravens are going to flop harder than me on prom night.  Bank on it.

HoW DaRE YoU MEnTioN DaYLtuN aND MuRVeeN!!!

[*jason*]

Most teams probably won't show up when they are scheduled to play us... Not in the cliche "We didn't show up today.". They literally will forfeit instead of facing Joe Burrow.

[*Nate (formerly eliminate08)*]

(05-15-2020, 06:09 PM)Nately120 Wrote: The Balti-LESS Turdbirds have a RB at QB and that's not going to last.  Hell, if that was even a good idea the Panthers would be teaching McCaffrey to throw the ball, HA!  They've had it handed to them in the playoffs two years in a row and Marvin Lewis and Andy Dalton can tell you that flopping in the post-season isn't something that just goes away because you wish upon a star, you know?  They lost to the Chargers and the Titans in the playoffs.  Please, we are so much better than either of those two teams that beat them and that's even before Burrow suits up and puts on his jock strap.

Once Burrow puts on that jock strap the Craven Ravens are going to flop harder than me on prom night.  Bank on it.

There yah go, nice thread. Maybe the delusion will change our luck LMAO!!!

[grampahol]

Cowpoke fans would pay big bucks just to go watch Jerry stand on the star and get old doing it even if the entire team quit.  .. Strange bunch down in Dallas..

[Nicomo Cosca]

(05-15-2020, 04:12 PM)SHRacerX Wrote: You can't say this definitively.  Dak is a far better athlete, but I think Dalton has the better accuracy and vision.  I just don't see him as the "hell of a QB" you make him out to be.  He has played on a ton of talent-laden teams and hasn't done anything in the post season, either.  When Dalton had a loaded team, he was an MVP candidate. 

It will be interesting to see what happens if Dak gets injured. 

Dak has a playoff win. We’d kill for that version of “done nothing in the playoffs” around here. And he played well in both his losses (103.2 rating & 99.2 rating). Andy’s highest rating in a playoff game is 67.0...

As far as accuracy, his completion% (65.8) and INT% (1.7) are both better than Dalton’s. (62.0 Cmp % 2.7 INT%).

[*SHRacerX*]

(05-16-2020, 01:30 AM)Nicomo Cosca Wrote: Dak has a playoff win. We’d kill for that version of “done nothing in the playoffs” around here. And he played well in both his losses (103.2 rating & 99.2 rating). Andy’s highest rating in a playoff game is 67.0...

As far as accuracy, his completion% (65.8) and INT% (1.7) are both better than Dalton’s. (62.0 Cmp % 2.7 INT%).

On different teams facing different defenses.  And I think you are assuming a bit much to say that we would kill for one and done in the playoffs with that roster.  And how many times has he made the playoffs?  

[Nicomo Cosca]

(05-16-2020, 09:13 AM)SHRacerX Wrote: On different teams facing different defenses.  And I think you are assuming a bit much to say that we would kill for one and done in the playoffs with that roster.  And how many times has he made the playoffs?  

This is getting silly now. Ofc they were on different teams playing different opponents lol. How many times has Dak been to the playoffs? 3. He’s 1-2. And like I said, he played well in the losses. Idk why we’re acting like the Cowboys are the Patriots though. Tony Romo was a damn good QB, and he went 2-4 in the playoffs in Dallas (career postseason rating of 93.0). And if we want to point the finger at Marvin for never getting us over the hump all those years, then you have to do the same with Jason Garrett.

As for Dak vs Andy, there’s a reason one is a Vegas favorite to win MVP (3rd highest odds behind Mahomes and Lamar) this season, and is looking for a huge payday, and the other just signed a 3m dollar contract to be a backup...

[BengalsRocker]

(05-14-2020, 08:21 PM)Bengalholic Wrote: Looks like Ben has already given up.....on everything. 

He looks like that MFer from Lord of the Rings.

[BengalsRocker]

(05-14-2020, 10:09 PM)Nately120 Wrote: This x1000.  You really have to wonder if our o-line has been bad or if we just had the kind of QB an o-line doesn't give a crap about actually protecting back there in Andy Dalton.  I actually once saw Dalton get flattened on a blown blocking assignment and he actually said "It's ok, I just hope that DE had a fun time driving me into the turf!"

It's going to be a real refreshing change to watch Burrow not only being an ace QB, but also walking up and down the sidelines whipping the entire roster into shape.  It'll be great to see Burrow scream and yell at Price until he stops being a bust and strangling Ross until he realizes that he's supposed to catch the damn ball.  Dalton wasn't going to do that.

I just wish Andy would stop busting Nanna and Pop Pop's chops for closet time!

[*Nately120*]

(05-16-2020, 05:09 PM)BengalsRocker Wrote: I just wish Andy would stop busting Nanna and Pop Pop's chops for closet time!

That looks more like Ryan Finley, honestly.

[BengalsRocker]

(05-16-2020, 09:28 PM)Nately120 Wrote: That looks more like Ryan Finley, honestly.

Ryan has more pocket awareness and agility... where ya been?

[HarleyDog]

(05-14-2020, 08:21 PM)Bengalholic Wrote: Looks like Ben has already given up.....on everything. 

Looks like he tossed a really bad salad! 

[*Nately120*]

(05-16-2020, 10:55 PM)HarleyDog Wrote: Looks like he tossed a really bad salad! 

I don't even want to know how/why you are fit to judge that.

[Nicomo Cosca]

He looks like a fat version of Joe Thornton.

[*SHRacerX*]

(05-16-2020, 01:13 PM)Nicomo Cosca Wrote: This is getting silly now. Ofc they were on different teams playing different opponents lol. How many times has Dak been to the playoffs? 3. He’s 1-2. And like I said, he played well in the losses. Idk why we’re acting like the Cowboys are the Patriots though. Tony Romo was a damn good QB, and he went 2-4 in the playoffs in Dallas (career postseason rating of 93.0). And if we want to point the finger at Marvin for never getting us over the hump all those years, then you have to do the same with Jason Garrett.

As for Dak vs Andy, there’s a reason one is a Vegas favorite to win MVP (3rd highest odds behind Mahomes and Lamar) this season, and is looking for a huge payday, and the other just signed a 3m dollar contract to be a backup...

After four years in to their careers:

Dak has 15,778 yards, 97 TDs, and 36 INTs
Andy had 14,758 yards, 99 TDs, and 66 INTs.

Aside from the dramatic difference in INTs, the other numbers are pretty similar.  Dak took over a team that was loaded for an injured Romo, Dalton took over a team that many expected to go 0-16.  Very different situations, very similar results.  

Oh, and Dalton took that team in a tough division to the playoffs all four years leading up to his best season in 2015, where he was an MVP consideration before the injury. 

It isn't as crazy as you make it sound.  I would love to see how Dak would fare in Cincy during those years.  Maybe I will get to see how Dalton would fare this year?   Who knows.  Either way, you can't say with 100 certainty that Dak is that much better because he has never had to play on a talent-depleted team.