Write it to existence part two/ SB version

[grampahol]

Well...I quit smoking after nearly 50 years,  my old lady has suddenly taken an interest in the Bengals for the first time in her life (72 years old) AND I JUST received my new drill press and it is all in ORANGE AND BLACK!  (WEN) 
It's in the bag.. 

[*Go Cards*]

(02-09-2022, 08:44 AM)grampahol Wrote: Well...I quit smoking after nearly 50 years,  my old lady has suddenly taken an interest in the Bengals for the first time in her life (72 years old) AND I JUST received my new drill press and it is all in ORANGE AND BLACK!  (WEN) 
It's in the bag.. 

Sounds good to me and congratulations on quitting smoking. I quit cigarettes and all tobacco products 23 years ago but don't ever see myself quitting the herb lol. 

[Interceptor]

"And with the 32nd pick in the 2022 NFL Draft, the Cincinnati Bengals select..."

[*Go Cards*]

(02-09-2022, 12:15 PM)Interceptor Wrote: "And with the 32nd pick in the 2022 NFL Draft, the Cincinnati Bengals select..."

Its going to be a whole different draft discussion in off season picking 32nd and

that's going to be a welcome feeling. 

[Interceptor]

(02-09-2022, 01:16 PM)Go Cards Wrote: Its going to be a whole different draft discussion in off season picking 32nd and

that's going to be a welcome feeling. 

It sucks. We have no time to make proper draft boards with backup scenarios and stuff. 

[TecmoBengals]

(02-09-2022, 01:16 PM)Go Cards Wrote: Its going to be a whole different draft discussion in off season picking 32nd and

that's going to be a welcome feeling. 

For sure, picking 32nd could never be more exciting. Picking 31st will sting.

[Interceptor]

(02-09-2022, 01:40 PM)TecmoBengals Wrote: For sure, the picking 32nd could never be more exciting. Picking 31st will sting.

Damn you. I didn't think about that until you said it. 

[TecmoBengals]

(02-09-2022, 01:42 PM)Interceptor Wrote: Damn you. I didn't think about that until you said it. 

I'm feeling good though we'll pick 32nd! 

[*Go Cards*]

(02-09-2022, 01:44 PM)TecmoBengals Wrote: I'm feeling good though we'll pick 32nd! 

Have come too far to look back now, 

In Joe I Trust !

[grampahol]

The draft will be irrelevant compared to the past few seasons..More of an afterthought. The Bengals aren't in CAP hell, don't have 75% of the team slated to be free agents on Monday morning and will still have Joe Burrow, Ja'Marr Chase, Tee Higgins, Tyler Boyd, Joe Mixon and a bunch more of defense as well so pick 32nd.. Everyone picked in the top 31 will be saying to themselves, DAMNED, why couldn't I have been picked 32nd instead of earlier with this loser? 

[*Go Cards*]

(02-09-2022, 04:27 PM)grampahol Wrote: The draft will be irrelevant compared to the past few seasons..More of an afterthought. The Bengals aren't in CAP hell, don't have 75% of the team slated to be free agents on Monday morning and will still have Joe Burrow, Ja'Marr Chase, Tee Higgins, Tyler Boyd, Joe Mixon and a bunch more of defense as well so pick 32nd.. Everyone picked in the top 31 will be saying to themselves, DAMNED, why couldn't I have been picked 32nd instead of earlier with this loser? 

Am ecstatic about the Bengals picking 32nd for the first time ever. 

Plus you just do like the Patriots did and add a FA every year as your first round pick to counter the NFL's parity 

[*Go Cards*]

(02-09-2022, 01:32 PM)Interceptor Wrote: It sucks. We have no time to make proper draft boards with backup scenarios and stuff. 

We have time because we already know it will be the 32nd pick, time to scour the 2nd round projections and try to find candidates who may drop to Bengals. 

 

[M.W.]

On the strength of a Henderickson strip sack with a Wilson return for a TD and a pick 6 from Awuzia the Bengals go into half time with a 21 point lead.
Mixon starts churning out longer runs in the second half leading to long sustained drives by the Bengals and wearing out the Rams.

Bengals - 38
Rams - 17

[*Go Cards*]

(02-09-2022, 08:28 PM)M.W. Wrote: On the strength of a Henderickson strip sack with a Wilson return for a TD and a pick 6 from Awuzia the Bengals go into half time with a 21 point lead.
Mixon starts churning out longer runs in the second half leading to long sustained drives by the Bengals and wearing out the Rams.

Bengals - 38
Rams - 17

Would not hurt my feelings at all. 

[*rfaulk34*]

(02-08-2022, 09:13 PM)Go Cards Wrote: Like your thinking and adding its his 5th FG of the day breaking the old record of 4, plus it was a 55 yd FG setting the SB distance made record as well. 

On side note, not positive but when looking up the SB records noticed that the youngest starter ever was 21 years and 322 days old. 

Pretty sure Ja'Marr Chase beats this age by a few weeks.  Wow, what if Chase becomes the youngest starter ever in SB and tops it off with the MVP award too.

Ja'Marr is already a couple weeks older than that right now. 

[*Go Cards*]

(02-09-2022, 08:59 PM)rfaulk34 Wrote: Ja'Marr is already a couple weeks older than that right now. 

No problem, will just have to settle for shattering the youngest ever to win the SB MVP trophy then.

Which stands at 24 years and 138 days old by Mr Mahomes, who really no longer wants the honor anyhow. 

[kurisu]

Coffin nails, bam bam bam they did it, unbelievable They won the Super Bowl.

[BengalB]

BEFORE the game, Snoop completely smokes out Donaldson, Miller and the other two. Since they're NFL players, they have zero tolerance and Snoop's green just totally annihilates them. But, worse than that? They are hungry. Real hungry. Hungry AF. Big man hungry.

They are big men, so you know they have major munchies so they, in their post Snoop Smoke Sesh stupor, decide the best idea is all go together and make an In N Out run! Nbd, since it's only a few blocks from the stadium and they go there all the time, they got that VIP status. No harm, no foul. Munchies will be tamed and they'll play lights out after that.

But VIPs or no, they get caught up in the Super Bowl traffic. If you know LA traffic, you know it takes them an hour and a half to get to their In N Out! It's fine, they still have plenty of time before the coin toss, so they stay the course...

They make it and boy are they famished, and my goodness do they eat. They go IN, get four animal style double doubles and four animal style fries and two large strawberry shakes, each. That hits the spot and they are ready to go.

And go they do! Because before they can make it the less than a mile back to their home stadium, they all have to make another stop, you know...for the out part of the In N Out experience. Thats ok, still plenty of time and Miller says he knows a short cut...

Miller does not know a short cut. AD decides to listen to him anyways, because he has poor judgement because it was Snoop's green. OF COURSE they take a wrong turn and somehow they've ended up on the 405, then the 5.

They look at the clock and cannot believe it. It cannot be 6:45 PM, can it? AD asks if that's pacific time? It is Pacific time.

They turn on the radio and immediately they hear "Bengals leading" and "broken SB records."

They immediately realize the game is over, they missed it, all of it, because of Snoop's Power Chronic, and because they got the munchies, which led to the unexpected stop at the local Costco to use the facilities, and then they took the wrong turn and they lost hella time, somehow.

Then they hear it: The Bengals have broken every Super Bowl record known to man.

So they do what anyone would do who is stoned, sad and finds themselves in Anaheim: They go to Disneyland, best to go now BEFORE they cannot show their faces there, or anywhere and at this point, only some Dole Whip will mend their broken hearts.

Joe Burrow has 10 TD's, Mixon ran in six, McPherson kicked a 78 yard FG just for fun and our D? The D has 19 picks, 11 of those were pick sixes. Zero sacks, zero turnovers for Burrow and the Fella's. Final score? Bengals 190. Rams 17.

And all this happens because Snoop is a major Bengals fan who smokes the world's strongest chronic and, as Afroman has told many of us, because they got high.  

I wrote this just for fun and also because I am so sick of hearing about the Rams defense and our O line. They are all just men, nothing more and nothing less. And who knows, maybe Snoop will see this...

[*Go Cards*]

(02-10-2022, 01:04 AM)kurisu Wrote: Coffin nails, bam bam bam they did it, unbelievable They won the Super Bowl.

Those words Sunday would the sweetest music to my ears. 

[*Go Cards*]

(02-10-2022, 02:26 AM)BengalB Wrote: BEFORE the game, Snoop completely smokes out Donaldson, Miller and the other two. Since they're NFL players, they have zero tolerance and Snoop's green just totally annihilates them. But, worse than that? They are hungry. Real hungry. Hungry AF. Big man hungry.

They are big men, so you know they have major munchies so they, in their post Snoop Smoke Sesh stupor, decide the best idea is all go together and make an In N Out run! Nbd, since it's only a few blocks from the stadium and they go there all the time, they got that VIP status. No harm, no foul. Munchies will be tamed and they'll play lights out after that.

But VIPs or no, they get caught up in the Super Bowl traffic. If you know LA traffic, you know it takes them an hour and a half to get to their In N Out! It's fine, they still have plenty of time before the coin toss, so they stay the course...

They make it and boy are they famished, and my goodness do they eat. They go IN, get four animal style double doubles and four animal style fries and two large strawberry shakes, each. That hits the spot and they are ready to go.

And go they do! Because before they can make it the less than a mile back to their home stadium, they all have to make another stop, you know...for the out part of the In N Out experience. Thats ok, still plenty of time and Miller says he knows a short cut...

Miller does not know a short cut. AD decides to listen to him anyways, because he has poor judgement because it was Snoop's green. OF COURSE they take a wrong turn and somehow they've ended up on the 405, then the 5.

They look at the clock and cannot believe it. It cannot be 6:45 PM, can it? AD asks if that's pacific time? It is Pacific time.

They turn on the radio and immediately they hear "Bengals leading" and "broken SB records."

They immediately realize the game is over, they missed it, all of it, because of Snoop's Power Chronic, and because they got the munchies, which led to the unexpected stop at the local Costco to use the facilities, and then they took the wrong turn and they lost hella time, somehow.

Then they hear it: The Bengals have broken every Super Bowl record known to man.

So they do what anyone would do who is stoned, sad and finds themselves in Anaheim: They go to Disneyland, best to go now BEFORE they cannot show their faces there, or anywhere and at this point, only some Dole Whip will mend their broken hearts.

Joe Burrow has 10 TD's, Mixon ran in six, McPherson kicked a 78 yard FG just for fun and our D? The D has 19 picks, 11 of those were pick sixes. Zero sacks, zero turnovers for Burrow and the Fella's. Final score? Bengals 190. Rams 17.

And all this happens because Snoop is a major Bengals fan who smokes the world's strongest chronic and, as Afroman has told many of us, because they got high.  

I wrote this just for fun and also because I am so sick of hearing about the Rams defense and our O line. They are all just men, nothing more and nothing less. And who knows, maybe Snoop will see this...





Not a Snoop fan but he would get my vote for MVP if this happened.