Issue with My Neighbor (Would Like Your Opinion)

[Wes Mantooth]

(02-23-2016, 11:36 AM)Belsnickel Wrote: 1.) I wouldn't worry about it too much. I stew over petty bullshit all the time and it's not exactly the healthiest thing. 2.) If anything, approach the guy at some point and apologize for the music thing again, give him your number if you are comfortable with it, and tell him to give you a call if it happens again. You being nice about it may change his perception of you, because I know that when I put up with some of the people in my building and their music I just automatically assume they're assholes and have a desire to respond in kind.

1.) You're right.  I've already given this way too much thought.  Although I think that only says even more that I am mindful of the thoughts of others and how actions are perceived.  Me feeling like I put someone else out caught me totally by surprise.  The last thing I would ever want to do is be that neighbor.

2.) I've thought about this and a few people have said something similarly.  I'm just going to leave it alone and not say anything unless he approaches me.  I apologized last night and I'm not sure I can bring it up again without coming across and as snarky or upset.  If he wants to clear the air or whatever I'm cool with it.  No biggie, but I feel if any apology is to be made at this point it needs to come from him.

[McC]

If he's like this at 25, what's he gonna be like at 60? Like somebody else said, get off my lawn.

A brief aside--we work in neighborhoods a lot of the time. You have to park your trucks somewhere. I've had guys come out of their house and tell me I can't park my truck in front of his house. He owns the house AND the street, you see.

I always move the truck and if there's nowhere to move, I assure the guy that I will move when a space opens up. No skin off my ass kind of thing.

You did the best thing, which was nothing. Now you know the guy he is. He was being a dick. You were the better man. I try to go with that as much as humanly possible. Choose maturity every time.

Don't be pushed but don't waste your time on tit for tat. Let the fool be the fool. Don't join him in fool town.

Mt mother always said don't let an asshole turn you into one. If you do, he's won. I know I'm being redundant. These are just lessons I've learned the hard way.

[Belsnickel]

(02-23-2016, 04:12 PM)Wes Mantooth Wrote: 1.) You're right.  I've already given this way too much thought.  Although I think that only says even more that I am mindful of the thoughts of others and how actions are perceived.  Me feeling like I put someone else out caught me totally by surprise.  The last thing I would ever want to do is be that neighbor.

I'm like that. There are lots of things I avoid doing in my apartment because I think someone might be bothered by it. I take a very German attitude to noise, though. Big fan of the concept of Ruhezeit (silent time) or Nachtruhe (night silence). This is why I've told my wife that when we get a house, we have to find somewhere without a lot of neighbors around.

[Belsnickel]

(02-23-2016, 04:20 PM)McC Wrote: If he's like this at 25, what's he gonna be like at 60? Like somebody else said, get off my lawn.

My wife tells me that all the time. I've been a "get off my lawn" type for a long time already, and I'm just 30.

[McC]

(02-23-2016, 04:24 PM)Belsnickel Wrote: My wife tells me that all the time. I've been a "get off my lawn" type for a long time already, and I'm just 30.

It is true that sometimes a prick mellows with age and there are sweethearts who get cranky with age so there's no guarantee either way.  Usually there's a woman around to do the mellowing and the getting cranky often has to do with not having one around. 

I have faith in your wife.  As a wife, if she sees this, it is her sworn duty to fix it or she gets thrown out of the club.  You, of course, are well aware of this.

[McC]

(02-23-2016, 04:12 PM)Wes Mantooth Wrote: 1.) You're right.  I've already given this way too much thought.  Although I think that only says even more that I am mindful of the thoughts of others and how actions are perceived.  Me feeling like I put someone else out caught me totally by surprise.  The last thing I would ever want to do is be that neighbor.

2.) I've thought about this and a few people have said something similarly.  I'm just going to leave it alone and not say anything unless he approaches me.  I apologized last night and I'm not sure I can bring it up again without coming across and as snarky or upset.  If he wants to clear the air or whatever I'm cool with it.  No biggie, but I feel if any apology is to be made at this point it needs to come from him.

This is called not being an asshole.  It's the only way to be.

[*Wyche'sWarrior*]

(02-23-2016, 03:58 PM)Wes Mantooth Wrote: This is a picture of the soundbar used in my grand setup



It does have a subwoofer, but it's on the other side of the room and I had set it to 2 (out of 5).  I think I had the soundbar around 5 or 6 out of 10.  Oh, and it faces away from his house.

Honestly, dude sounds like a total prick.  I guess it's good he lives nowhere near me!  Then again, most all of my immediate neighbors are music lovers and are often jamming their garage stereos in the spring, summer, and fall.....hell, I set up a LCD projector on the end of my house, and 1000 watt Onkyo system for Fare Thee Well on July 5th!  I'm very fortunate in the neighbor department, even the retired military vet on the other side of me is cool as ice.

Anyway, it might be the subwoofer he is hearing.  I know that is a low setting, but the bass will always carry, and even vibrate pictures, etc.....even at low volumes.  If you can ever discuss this with the little douchebag, ask him if that's the part he's hearing.  Could save you and him both a little headache.

[Tiger Teeth]

Kick his ass. That'll shut him up.

[*Wyche'sWarrior*]

(02-23-2016, 04:34 PM)McC Wrote: This is called not being an asshole.  It's the only way to be.

Right, and if you DO have get togethers, you invite all of your immediate neighbors, and tell them not to hesitate to drop a line if they don't come and feel you're being too loud.  I've ALWAYS practiced this.....that's why I got angry enough one time to break out a chainsaw....lol.

Seriously though, other than that one time, I've never had an issue, just by being up front and open as far as parties/cookouts/etc go.  Luckily, most of my neighbors come over, and those that don't are pretty indifferent about it.

[Bengalzona]

Optionally what you could do is just play it whenever and however you like. Next time he knocks on the door invite him in and say: "Let's do a little experiment. If I can still hear the soundbar over your screams as I shove my **** in your ***, then it is too loud. Okay, *****?"

[Belsnickel]

(02-23-2016, 04:31 PM)McC Wrote: It is true that sometimes a prick mellows with age and there are sweethearts who get cranky with age so there's no guarantee either way.  Usually there's a woman around to do the mellowing and the getting cranky often has to do with not having one around. 

I have faith in your wife.  As a wife, if she sees this, it is her sworn duty to fix it or she gets thrown out of the club.  You, of course, are well aware of this.

My problem is that I just stew about it instead of actually saying anything. Of course, if I did say anything it would start off with "excuse me, would you mind turning it down a bit?" I like my quiet, but I'm not an asshole.

[XenoMorph]

(02-23-2016, 04:23 PM)Belsnickel Wrote: I'm like that. There are lots of things I avoid doing in my apartment because I think someone might be bothered by it. I take a very German attitude to noise, though. Big fan of the concept of Ruhezeit (silent time) or Nachtruhe (night silence). This is why I've told my wife that when we get a house, we have to find somewhere without a lot of neighbors around.

same i got a surround sound system sitting in a box because i know it will shake the walls of my apartment and those nearby.

at least it was just a little noise and not like you dogs favorite spot to poop is his yard lol.

He might have a real early type job i have a friend that used to have to be at work 4:30 every day which ment bed by 9... but it thats your life you invest in sound proofing.

[*bfine32*]

(02-23-2016, 03:55 PM)Wes Mantooth Wrote: It's a guy and his sister, both of which are in their mid to late twenties.

bfine32: "Sorry dude, it wasn't my music, it was your sister ; she's a screamer."

[Rainbow stiller]

Hit on him. I've learned that one of two things will happen

1 they will avoid you
Or 2 you will get laid.

Either way you win.

[Wes Mantooth]

(02-24-2016, 12:37 AM)Rainbow stiller Wrote: Hit on him. I've learned that one of two things will happen

1 they will avoid you
Or 2 you will get laid.

Either way you win.

What if I just went over to his house and did this?

[Bengalzona]

If you are passive-aggressive, you could always just impregnate his sister.

Then tell him, "How about dem apples!"

[Rainbow stiller]

(02-24-2016, 01:02 AM)Wes Mantooth Wrote: What if I just went over to his house and did this?

I don't see why not.....but leave the sister out of it, that's gross.

[*Wyche'sWarrior*]

(02-24-2016, 01:44 AM)Bengalzona Wrote: If you are passive-aggressive, you could always just impregnate his sister.

Then tell him, "How about dem apples!"  

Chipperson?

[StoneTheCrow]

Sounds like the classic situation where you think of the perfect thing to say, only ten minutes too late. Then you're pissed for a while that you missed your chance.

[*Awful Llama*]

(02-23-2016, 03:55 PM)Wes Mantooth Wrote: No kids.  It's a guy and his sister, both of which are in their mid to late twenties.

And, I immediately flash to these two: