Absurd, and Hopefully Humorous to Some, Hypothetical Question...

[bonesaw]

Red Dogs, ICehouses, Zima's with Jolly ranchers, nudie mags, Everclear, shrooms, Bubba the Love Sponge, etc..... I'm 38 so this sounds like my kind of party fellas

[grampahol]

You kids these days . You haven't even begun to party until you do a bunch of peyote then go stand out on the freeway and  watch the same semi truck roll right in front of your eyes for an hour then later wonder if you may have been standing by the train tracks instead . Sometimes I kind of miss being invincible.. 

Heck, just go buy a few hundred bucks worth of cheap wine and spend the evening with the winos in the park in some small western town somewhere .You would be surprised how much  fun those old winos can really be.. lol

[*Go Cards*]

(02-18-2018, 12:15 PM)grampahol Wrote: You kids these days . You haven't even begun to party until you do a bunch of peyote then go stand out on the freeway and  watch the same semi truck roll right in front of your eyes for an hour then later wonder if you may have been standing by the train tracks instead . Sometimes I kind of miss being invincible.. 

Heck, just go buy a few hundred bucks worth of cheap wine and spend the evening with the winos in the park in some small western town somewhere .You would be surprised how much  fun those old winos can really be.. lol

Yep we are a fun group. 

Mad Dog 20/20  baby !

[bengalhoel]

(02-18-2018, 12:15 PM)grampahol Wrote: You kids these days . You haven't even begun to party until you do a bunch of peyote then go stand out on the freeway and  watch the same semi truck roll right in front of your eyes for an hour then later wonder if you may have been standing by the train tracks instead . Sometimes I kind of miss being invincible.. 

Heck, just go buy a few hundred bucks worth of cheap wine and spend the evening with the winos in the park in some small western town somewhere .You would be surprised how much  fun those old winos can really be.. lol

Just dont pass out around them!!! Or you will wake up sore if you know what I mean!!!

[Circleville Guy]

So the moderators are cool with these kind of classy threads? It seems very little to do about football and more to do with sick perversions. Is this a Bengal/ Sex/ Fart Fetish board now? Enjoy this topic folks, think I’ll skip...seeing how it really isn’t about football.

[bengalhoel]

(02-18-2018, 05:31 PM)Circleville Guy Wrote: So the moderators are cool with these kind of classy threads? It seems very little to do about football and more to do with sick perversions. Is this a Bengal/ Sex/ Fart Fetish board now? Enjoy this topic folks, think I’ll skip...seeing how it really isn’t about football.

Did you watch Bengals football this year? Everything that Wes Mantooth said in this thread was about 1000 times less perverted, sick and twisted than what I said about players, coaches and refs in the privacy of my own home this year. 

Every Sunday during football season my wife questions her decision to marry me and I spend the rest of the week apologizing, until Sunday comes again and Im right back at it.

So I applaud you humorous thread for making me not only feel better , but know that the Bengals drive you to this sort of madness as well.  

Good Show!!

[*Go Cards*]

(02-18-2018, 01:28 PM)bengalhoel Wrote: Just dont pass out around them!!! Or you will wake up sore if you know what I mean!!!

Reminds me of when I went to the proctologist and he put on his glove which always makes me uncomfortable. 

But it really became uncomfortable when he placed both his hands on my shoulders. 

Never looked back and never went back. 

[bengalhoel]

(02-19-2018, 03:53 AM)Go Cards Wrote: Reminds me of when I went to the proctologist and he put on his glove which always makes me uncomfortable. 

But it really became uncomfortable when he placed both his hands on my shoulders. 

Never looked back and never went back. 

I was wondering what happened to you!!!  So can I put you down for a Thursday?

[*Wyche'sWarrior*]

(02-16-2018, 06:29 PM)Wes Mantooth Wrote: The week of your stay you guys always use the time as an ethnic food adventure.  A whole lot of Indian food (so much so that Paul is diving into leftover Curry for breakfast). You guys eat Ethopian, Mexican, Chinese, on down the list.  Lotta foods not found in Americanized places, all of it spicy, and much of it from street vendors.

Paul treats you to the food, and goes out of his way to welcome you into his home.  Real nice house, and you get a big bedroom. The only negative with the home is that he only has one working bathroom and the exhaust fan is broken.

Paul has a 70" 4k TV with the best cable package you can get.  He's down for watching sports, 80's comedies, and he's got a fridge in the garage stocked full of beer. 

Every evening before bed he'll play a few bars on the old piano and make the following comment "You know I can tickle the keys, but I can tickle a whole lot more too."  Then he'll giggle and pretend like he was kidding. Sometimes you wake with him standing in your doorway in tighty whities, just heavily breathing. He'll claim this is a result of a nightmare, but his massive erection leaves you doubting that.

All expenses are paid, and you slowly find Paul to be pretty fun to hang with.  So yeah, lot's a great food, big ol TV, and as much beer as you want. 

You wanna change your stance on the Paul situation, or are you standing pat with a definitive "no effin way"?

My mind's eye!!!!!!

[*Wyche'sWarrior*]

(02-18-2018, 12:29 PM)Go Cards Wrote: Yep we are a fun group. 

Mad Dog 20/20  baby !

Thunderbird.

[*Go Cards*]

(02-19-2018, 11:59 AM)Wyche Wrote: Thunderbird.

Boone's Farm 

[*Go Cards*]

(02-19-2018, 05:12 AM)bengalhoel Wrote: I was wondering what happened to you!!!  So can I put you down for a Thursday?

Told you I am never coming back.

[Shouldamapads]

You lost me at Katie is single. I am guessing there's more-like I should marry her.

You've got waaaaay too much time on your hands. PLease help out a soup kitchen or local shelter.

[BengalHawk62]

(02-19-2018, 12:18 PM)Go Cards Wrote: Boone's Farm 

Boone's Farm and 4 Loco beer is the start to every successful day. 

[*Wyche'sWarrior*]

(02-16-2018, 11:12 PM)Wes Mantooth Wrote: I always forget that we're pretty much the same exact age. (I'm 39) I think I may be a couple of years older, but we share a lot of similar stories. Ex: First time I ever was really wasted, was wasted was off Zima. And yes, the girls there did have Jolly Ranchers they dropped in too.  I think I only 5 or 6 but was wrecked. (We also fired up a classy coke can bowl. lol) Was 14 or 15, this was in '94 or so.  I still feel like a gigantic *****.

Another similar story to your other one (I love reading this type of stuff so I figured I'd share too).  I went out with a buddy one night and he convinced me to try shrooms for the first time. I figured why the hell not, we're just chilling here, what's the worst that can happen?  Well, the answer to that mirrors your story.

The guy I was for some reason decided we need to go over his buddies house, who I didn't know at all.  It's kicking in right when we get there. All was good, was having a blast. I think we watched Up in Smoke or some bs.  Anyways, the guy I came with just decides he has to take off but he's going home and his parents won't let him have guests. He said he could drop me off but I didn't want any part of facing my mom in my current state.  So his buddy says, "hey, dude you can stay here".  That works, I thought. Sounds great. (Wrong!)

The guy whose house it was relatively sober (didn't smoke, and definitely didn't eat anything I did). So I'm just sitting there, with some dude I hardly know, kinda geeked out, while he's just nursing a beer. Kinda weird. Gets better...

Then his girlfirend comes over. At this point I'm only like an hour, hour and a half into this experience. So his girls shows up, and it's like 11:30 or something. They choose to go upstairs of course, and he helps get me set up downstairs in the basement. He says, you can crash here but don't turn on the TV down here, my parents bedroom is right over there, so be quiet.  Music was also out of question apparently.

Back in the day without a TV or stereo, what do you do exactly if you're just chilling by your lonesome? The answer was nothing. You sit there in silence, staring at the wall, trying not to freak out.  So I sat for what seemed like forever. Checked the time and it had been like a half hour. So I said eff this, and went upstairs and knocked on his door.

Me: "Hey, man. You got a walkman or something?" 
Him: "No, man. You want a few magazines or something?" (What? Who wants to read Sports Illustrated when tripping?)
Me: "No, I'm good. Just bored."
Him: "Don't freak out about it, dude. Just go to bed."
Me:  "I guess I'll try?
His girlfriend: "Let's go downstairs and hang out a bit."

Cool, I thought. Turns out, not so cool. I don't know these people and we're all just kinda of sitting there making small talk. At this point, I may be just making noises and not words, who knows. But I remember it was awkward. Then they start fighting and talking about all sorts of people and things I have no clue about. So I'm left sitting in a basement, with a couple i don't know, listening to them bicker while I'm on another planet.

Couldn't take it much more, and just decided that I needed to get the frack out of there. So I literally just got up left. Most I might I have said was "I gotta go."  Problem was I didn't drive, wasn't in the condition to drive, and my house was 3 miles away. Didn't matter. I just needed to leave this hell-hole.

I walked home in the pouring rain at like 1 or 2am. Took me over an hour and I was drenched. I was still pretty messed up when I got home so I decided to just sit in my car until it wore off.  I think I may have been listening to Bubba the Love Sponge (Mad rep points to everyone that remembers that show). That was by far the highlight of my night.

I'm still good friends with the guy who bailed, and I still give him shat today for talking me into doing that and then just dipping on me.  He claims he just needed to get out of there.  Yeah, dick, tell me about it.

Sorry for the length of the post... (I really should just make this my sig.) Thought you might get a laugh.

I was a senior in high school in 94.  We used Jolly Ranchers as "mixers" for 100 proof vodka.....ya buncha pantywaists.


Shrooms......good times.  I can't believe ol' buddy left you out to dry with someone you didn't know on a good trip...lol.  We used to eat the hell outta those things in college.  I'm talking every weekend, at least a half quarter bag at a time.  I'd have completely wigged out on those people.  Hell, me and some buddies sat in the parking lot of a mini mart for a good thirty minutes arguing over who was gonna go in and get cigarettes one night.  "They'll know...."

[*Wyche'sWarrior*]

(02-19-2018, 12:18 PM)Go Cards Wrote: Boone's Farm 

"That Nighttrain's a mean wine...."

[*Go Cards*]

(02-17-2018, 05:40 PM)Nate (formerly eliminate08) Wrote: Just terrible man lol



Have had very similar experiences ha ha and i am almost as old as you guys, born in 82'. 

The worst had to be when i was like 15 and drank almost a whole fifth of Vodka with some older friends.

Went down like water, was just fine for a couple of hours and then just hit me like a freight train. Spent the entire night
puking in the yard and getting carried around by strangers. Had alcohol poisoning for like a week. Took a long time for
me to drink vodka again.

Oh and the Jager Tequila night was one for the ages. Arm wrestling some dude all night that the next week was going
to enter the military. He got real drunk and decided to walk home in the middle of winter in a snow storm. Dude would
of died but we all got in a car and tracked him down but he didn't want to get in the car. So a buddy of my friends who
i never liked just bashed him over the head with one of those big ass old flashlights and we threw him in the car.

Lot of fun lol

Have a funny Shroom story that is a lot more lighthearted. Went sturgeon fishing down in Idaho fishing for White Sturgeon.

It was a big ass party they have every year where about 100 or so people go and we all get trashed. Afterwards me and
my friend were the last 2 people there and were left with a big old bag of Shrooms and it was up to us, mainly me to eat
them up before we hit the road so we don't get busted. I ate Shrooms many times before but nothing really happened.

This time was different big time. I was playing guitar and all of a sudden i just lost the frets and looked at my hand and
it looked like it was a mile away. I decided i was tripping too hard to play so i made a trip down the hill about ten feet to
the van and put my guitar in its case. I then looked back up to my friend and he looked a mile or two away, except he
was only ten feet away sitting under an olive tree. Whoa, then i made the long trek up to the tree.

Sat on my lawn chair and looked across the river. Could see cows chewing on the grass on the mountain 5 miles away
like they were right in front of me. I decided i better drink some beers to try and change this wild trip, helped a bit but
by nightfall i was still pretty messed up. I had to sleep in the tent while my friend slept in the van.

We were at a place where we find tons of arrowheads and more Native American type artifacts. At night time in the
tent i could swear i heard Native Americans walking around my tent and dancing around me like they were dancing
around a fire. One wild night.

Never did Shrooms again.

All you guys born around this time please note.

Born in 63, and if I am your Daddy ?

My apologies for not being around and passing down the Bengals fan and partying gene. 

Sorry boys. 

[*Go Cards*]

(02-19-2018, 02:17 PM)Wyche Wrote: "That Nighttrain's a mean wine...."

My first bottle was Tickle Pink, lol. 

But it was funny because was on vacation in Florida and was 15 years old. 

Met two guys that were 17 years old and already had a hook up with some college girls down the beach. 

But they were perpetrating being n college as well and although both were just a few months away from being 18 they could not buy the wine the girls wanted. 

So being I am of good size and looked older as a last ditch effort was sent in to try to purchase. 

No problem and became a night to remember for that 15 year old little boy. 

Does not sound like a manly wine but it sure brings back some becoming a man memories. 

Oh to go back to 1978 and that Ft Lauderdale Beach. 

Parents never found out and Dad has passed now. But think he would have been proud while delving out my punishment if so. 

[bengalhoel]

(02-19-2018, 02:31 PM)Go Cards Wrote: All you guys born around this time please note.  

Born in 63, and if I am your Daddy ?

My apologies for not being around and passing down the Bengals fan and partying gene. 

Sorry boys. 

Born in 75 and been watching this train wreck since I can remember so I am at least 120 in regular people years. Bengals fans age faster. Its a proven fact.

[*Wyche'sWarrior*]

(02-19-2018, 02:41 PM)Go Cards Wrote: My first bottle was Tickle Pink, lol. 

But it was funny because was on vacation in Florida and was 15 years old. 

Met two guys that were 17 years old and already had a hook up with some college girls down the beach. 

But they were perpetrating being n college as well and although both were just a few months away from being 18 they could not buy the wine the girls wanted. 

So being I am of good size and looked older as a last ditch effort was sent in to try to purchase. 

No problem and became a night to remember for that 15 year old little boy. 

Does not sound like a manly wine but it sure brings back some becoming a man memories. 

Oh to go back to 1978 and that Ft Lauderdale Beach. 

Parents never found out and Dad has passed now. But think he would have been proud while delving out my punishment if so. 

I don't recall that one.....would that go on to become Strawberry Hill?