Not from the Onion....

[RoyleRedlegs]

Had an idea for a FUN (let's keep it that way please) thread in here about real stories that you could swear would have to be from the Onion but aren't.

Getting it started off:
Canadian school cancels yoga program to end cultural appropriation

[BmorePat87]

http://www.politico.com/story/2015/11/polls-donald-trump-ben-carson-216132

Donald Trump and Ben Carson lead the GOP primary polling

[RoyleRedlegs]

(11-23-2015, 03:02 PM)BmorePat87 Wrote: http://www.politico.com/story/2015/11/polls-donald-trump-ben-carson-216132

Donald Trump and Ben Carson lead the GOP primary polling

It sounds like the set up to a bad 80's sitcom

[6andcounting]

I posted this on P&R when I first saw it.

http://pittsburgh.cbslocal.com/2015/06/04/bus-messages-called-offensive-when-read-backwards/

After 12 years the Pittsburgh Port Authority removed "Ziggin and Zaggin" from the side of like 4 buses out of the entire county fleet because someone complained that if you read it backwards it sounds like you hate black people.

[RoyleRedlegs]

(11-23-2015, 03:17 PM)6andcounting Wrote: I posted this on P&R when I first saw it.

http://pittsburgh.cbslocal.com/2015/06/04/bus-messages-called-offensive-when-read-backwards/

After 12 years the Pittsburgh Port Authority removed "Ziggin and Zaggin" from the side of like 4 buses out of the entire county fleet because someone complained that if you read it backwards it sounds like you hate black people.

People are really offended by "dna" ridiculous. 

[6andcounting]

(11-23-2015, 02:32 PM)RoyleRedlegs Wrote: Had an idea for a FUN (let's keep it that way please) thread in here about real stories that you could swear would have to be from the Onion but aren't.

Getting it started off:
Canadian school cancels yoga program to end cultural appropriation

After they got slammed for their cultural appropriation reasoning, they changed why the cancelled it to that the programmed needed to be reviewed by the university. After people tore them up saying it doesn't require cancelling yoga to do it, they gave the excuse that nobody attended. All 3 of these different stories were given by the department on the same Facebook post they made to address the issue. People are tearing the posts and the department apart. Quite entertaining.

They also insisted that temporarily suspending the regularly scheduled classes is different from cancelling the classes. lol.

[RoyleRedlegs]

(11-23-2015, 04:17 PM)6andcounting Wrote: After they got slammed for their cultural appropriation reasoning, they changed why the cancelled it to that the programmed needed to be reviewed by the university. After people tore them up saying it doesn't require cancelling yoga to do it, they gave the excuse that nobody attended. All 3 of these different stories were given by the department on the same Facebook post they made to address the issue. People are tearing the posts and the department apart. Quite entertaining.

They also insisted that temporarily suspending the regularly scheduled classes is different from cancelling the classes. lol.

It's incredibly hilarious considering modern yoga appropriated western "stretching" into a lot of it's poses compared to "traditional" yoga. 

[6andcounting]

(11-23-2015, 05:08 PM)RoyleRedlegs Wrote: It's incredibly hilarious considering modern yoga appropriated western "stretching" into a lot of it's poses compared to "traditional" yoga. 

I'll take you for your word because I'm not gonna lie; I know nothing about yoga.

[RoyleRedlegs]

(11-23-2015, 05:41 PM)6andcounting Wrote: I'll take you for your word because I'm not gonna lie; I know nothing about yoga.

I stumbled upon this when reading the original story, http://www.yogajournal.com/article/philosophy/yoga-s-greater-truth/

[oncemoreuntothejimbreech]

http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/west-point-bans-cadet-pillow-fights-after-30-injured-n470216

Army bans pillow fighting.

[GMDino]

Australian Man's Fight With a Spider Ends With Police at His Door

http://abcnews.go.com/International/australian-mans-fight-spider-ends-police-door/story?id=35451324

Quote:Police in Australia were called to a home to investigate domestic violence, but when they arrived all they found was a man and a spider.

The Harbourside Local Area Command of the New South Wales Police Force received numerous calls early Saturday morning from neighbors concerned about domestic violence at a residence in Wollstonecraft, Australia, police spokesman Dean Lindley told ABC News today.

"We had numerous calls to our emergency number stating that a woman could be heard screaming with a man yelling, 'I'm going to kill you, die, die,' with what sounded like furniture being overturned and or a hitting sound," Lindley said.

‘Kissing Bug’ Can Lead to Dangerous Parasite Infection While You Sleep
Pennsylvania Woman Says She 'Freaked Out' After Finding Black Widow Spider in Package of Grapes
Police showed up at the 32-year-old man’s house within three minutes, Lindley said, and asked him where his wife or partner was. After some questioning, the man became "sheepish" and admitted he was just trying to kill a spider, Lindley wrote in a post on the police force's Facebook page, where he also shared the transcript of the conversation.

"It quickly turned to embarrassment when he realized he would have to admit to the screaming like a girl thing," Lindley said.

After checking out the home to make sure there was no one else there, Lindley said police left.

"After a can of Mortein, I'm not so sad to report the spider did not make it," Lindley said. "I asked one of the probationary constables fresh from the academy to perform CPR and heart compressions, but of course he carried on like a big girl and refused. It's hard to get good help these days."

[RoyleRedlegs]

Turkish courts asking LOTR experts to decide if a man comparing the president to Gollum is an insult...if deemed yes, he could face actual jail time

[Vas Deferens]

(12-02-2015, 06:55 PM)RoyleRedlegs Wrote: Turkish courts asking LOTR experts to decide if a man comparing the president to Gollum is an insult...if deemed yes, he could face actual jail time

Amazing how people just don't know when to leave things alone.  Absolutely amazing.

[RoyleRedlegs]

Bud Weisser arrested for trespassing at the Budweiser brewery

[oncemoreuntothejimbreech]

Man arrested for snorting cocaine during traffic stop.

http://abcnews.go.com/Weird/wireStory/man-arrested-snort-cocaine-traffic-stop-35590043

Quote:Seattle police say a 73-year-old man was arrested after he tried to snort cocaine during a traffic stop.

Police say Officer Nic Abts-Olsen stopped a man driving a car with the headlights off Thursday night near Martin Luther King Jr. Way South and South Massachusetts Street.

During the stop, Abts-Olsen checked the man's license and registration and says he startled the man when he returned to the vehicle, causing him to spill cocaine on his hands and the floor of the car.

Police say the man initially tried to brush away the white powder, denied it was cocaine and said he had vitamins in his possession.

Eventually, the man told police snorting cocaine in the middle of a traffic stop was perhaps a poor decision.

He was arrested for narcotics possession.

[GMDino]

http://www.wtae.com/video/buzz60/man-smuggles-51-turtles-in-pants-pleads-guilty-to-charges/36792112?utm_source=Social&utm_medium=FBPAGE&utm_content=shub2014&utm_campaign=WTAE-TV%20Pittsburgh&Content%20Type=Story

Man smuggles 51 turtles in pants, pleads guilty to charges

[oncemoreuntothejimbreech]

(12-05-2015, 01:15 PM)GMDino Wrote: http://www.wtae.com/video/buzz60/man-smuggles-51-turtles-in-pants-pleads-guilty-to-charges/36792112?utm_source=Social&utm_medium=FBPAGE&utm_content=shub2014&utm_campaign=WTAE-TV%20Pittsburgh&Content%20Type=Story

Man smuggles 51 turtles in pants, pleads guilty to charges

I usually only have one turtle in my pants.

[SunsetBengal]

http://www.msn.com/en-us/travel/news/an-8-year-old-came-up-with-an-amazing-way-to-locate-missing-airplanes/ar-AAfWYKm?ocid=spartandhp

8 year old comes up with way to locate missing aircraft

[oncemoreuntothejimbreech]

(12-06-2015, 11:46 AM)SunsetBengal Wrote: http://www.msn.com/en-us/travel/news/an-8-year-old-came-up-with-an-amazing-way-to-locate-missing-airplanes/ar-AAfWYKm?ocid=spartandhp

8 year old comes up with way to locate missing aircraft

I love that someone took the time to encourage an 8 year old.

[Belsnickel]

http://thehill.com/blogs/in-the-know/in-the-know/263713-poll-30-percent-of-republicans-want-to-bomb-country-from