I feel sad that someone lost their life, but this story is just funny.

http://empirenews.net/teen-girl-dies-while-masturbating-parents-blame-extremely-large-dildo/

[quote“[Name redacted] knew she wasn’t supposed to use her mother’s big, black double-ender, and we’d never thought she’d sneak into our room and take it,” said Joe. “We didn’t really want to bring it up to her, because it’s embarrassing. I’d give anything to go back in time now, and tell her not to use such a big one. She wasn’t ready for that yet.”][/quote]

(12-18-2015, 12:27 PM)SunsetBengal Wrote: I feel sad that someone lost their life, but this story is just funny.

http://empirenews.net/teen-girl-dies-while-masturbating-parents-blame-extremely-large-dildo/

[quote“[Name redacted] knew she wasn’t supposed to use her mother’s big, black double-ender, and we’d never thought she’d sneak into our room and take it,” said Joe. “We didn’t really want to bring it up to her, because it’s embarrassing. I’d give anything to go back in time now, and tell her not to use such a big one. She wasn’t ready for that yet.”]

[/quote]

Surprised you fell for such an obviously fake news story.

9" in circumference? GTFO with that. Dead give away right there.

Surprised you fell for such an obviously fake news story.
[/quote]

I posted it because it was funny, and would be fun to see if anyone on here actually bought it.  Congratulations, you ruined a good joke on the 1st post..

(12-18-2015, 12:40 PM)Tiger Teeth Wrote: 9" in circumference?  GTFO with that.  Dead give away right there.

Which makes a diameter of 2.88"

(12-18-2015, 12:42 PM)SunsetBengal Wrote: Surprised you fell for such an obviously fake news story.

I posted it because it was funny, and would be fun to see if anyone on here actually bought it.  Congratulations, you ruined a good joke on the 1st post..
[/quote]

The old, I was playing along to see if anyone else would fall for it bit. Oldest trick in the book.

(12-18-2015, 12:48 PM)Au165 Wrote: I posted it because it was funny, and would be fun to see if anyone on here actually bought it.  Congratulations, you ruined a good joke on the 1st post..

The old, I was playing along to see if anyone else would fall for it bit. Oldest trick in the book.
[/quote]

Pretty sure that those on here, who interact with me on a somewhat regular basis, would have looked at the way I titled the thread and knew it was going to be a spoof.

(12-18-2015, 12:54 PM)SunsetBengal Wrote: Pretty sure that those on here, who interact with me on a somewhat regular basis, would have looked at the way I titled the thread and knew it was going to be a spoof.

Do you need some assistance with the quote function?

(12-18-2015, 03:06 PM)XenoMorph Wrote: Do you need some assistance with the quote function?

I think the issue was he had an open ended quote to start, then I quoted him and that left a close tag, then he quoted a quote with an open close tag. It just all spiraled out of control!

(12-18-2015, 12:27 PM)SunsetBengal Wrote: I feel sad that someone lost their life, but this story is just funny.

http://empirenews.net/teen-girl-dies-while-masturbating-parents-blame-extremely-large-dildo/

[quote“[Name redacted] knew she wasn’t supposed to use her mother’s big, black double-ender, and we’d never thought she’d sneak into our room and take it,” said Joe. “We didn’t really want to bring it up to her, because it’s embarrassing. I’d give anything to go back in time now, and tell her not to use such a big one. She wasn’t ready for that yet.”]

[/quote]

Don't worry about these other guys Sunset.  I thought it was chuckle worthy.   Maybe not, , but most definitely . 

Surprised the " Onion " had no involvement

(12-18-2015, 03:42 PM)Au165 Wrote: I think the issue was he had an open ended quote to start, then I quoted him and that left a close tag, then he quoted a quote with an open close tag. It just all spiraled out of control!

rofl...

If this was a serious article my first question would have been why did his wife have a doubler sider?

(12-18-2015, 12:40 PM)Tiger Teeth Wrote: 9" in circumference?  GTFO with that.  Dead give away right there.

I know. Nothing is that small, right?

(12-18-2015, 06:04 PM)XenoMorph Wrote: rofl...

If this was a serious article my first question would have been why did his wife have a doubler sider?

If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

NOBODY!

(12-18-2015, 06:08 PM)Benton Wrote: I know. Nothing is that small, right?




If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

NOBODY!

ive always wanted to smack someone across the face with a dildo so hard it left a shapely bruise.

(12-18-2015, 06:11 PM)XenoMorph Wrote: ive always wanted to smack someone across the face with a dildo so hard it left a shapely bruise.

It's only funny the first five or six times. After that, you're just going through the motions.

Mostly swinging motions.

(12-18-2015, 06:11 PM)XenoMorph Wrote: ive always wanted to smack someone across the face with a dildo so hard it left a shapely bruise.

Good idea, then everyone that they encountered (at least for a few days) would be able to clearly see that they are a ****head..

(12-18-2015, 06:04 PM)XenoMorph Wrote: rofl...

If this was a serious article my first question would have been why did his wife have a doubler sider?

So that she had another, once she wore the one side down ?


I'm just tired of the racism of all the "big ones" being black, in every story.
#WhiteDongsMatter

(12-18-2015, 06:04 PM)XenoMorph Wrote: rofl...

If this was a serious article my first question would have been why did his wife have a doubler sider?

Because she has a front and back side!

(12-18-2015, 06:11 PM)XenoMorph Wrote: ive always wanted to smack someone across the face with a dildo so hard it left a shapely bruise.

I've done that numerous times using the real thing. 

(12-19-2015, 12:01 PM)bfine32 Wrote: I've done that numerous times using the real thing. 

Did your sister get mad?