Not from the Onion....

[*Nately120*]

(12-18-2015, 07:30 PM)Belsnickel Wrote: http://thehill.com/blogs/in-the-know/in-the-know/263713-poll-30-percent-of-republicans-want-to-bomb-country-from

I'm all for this, but I'm worried we will have to cut into our budget for invading Narnia.

[*bfine32*]

(12-18-2015, 07:30 PM)Belsnickel Wrote: http://thehill.com/blogs/in-the-know/in-the-know/263713-poll-30-percent-of-republicans-want-to-bomb-country-from

Luckily they were out numbered by the 36% of Dems who opposed bombing the Country. 

[*Nately120*]

(12-18-2015, 08:32 PM)bfine32 Wrote: Luckily they were out numbered by the 36% of Dems who opposed bombing the Country. 

I'm sure democrats could be duped into supporting massively taxing Charles Foster Kane's Xanadu, then.

[Aquapod770]

(12-18-2015, 07:30 PM)Belsnickel Wrote: http://thehill.com/blogs/in-the-know/in-the-know/263713-poll-30-percent-of-republicans-want-to-bomb-country-from

The really scary thing is I'm betting close to 95% of people who voted on that didn't know it wasn't a real place. 

[Rotobeast]

(12-18-2015, 09:10 PM)Nately120 Wrote: I'm sure democrats could be duped into supporting massively taxing Charles Foster Kane's Xanadu, then.

No Olivia ?

[GMDino]

Woman Assaults Husband For Farting In Bed

http://cbs12.com/news/top-stories/stories/vid_32346.shtml?wap=0

Quote:Story by CBS12 Web team

PORT ST. LUCIE (CBS12) -- A woman is facing a charge of battery for fighting with her husband who couldn't stop passing gas.

Donald Fitzroy Meikle told police that his wife, Dawn, elbowed him on the arm when he passed gas in bed. This happened early in the morning on Dec. 11. Meikle said she eventually kicked him out of bed because his flatulence wouldn't stop.

The victim said his wife let him back into bed. He passed gas again, according to the report, and she started to kick and elbow him again. Meikle said he held his wife for his own safety. During the struggle, she suffered a broken lip and he suffered a lot of scratches across his chest.

Donald's wife called 911.

Police said she also sprayed pepper spray to keep her husband out of the bathroom.

Police arrested Dawn Meikle for domestic battery and took her to the St. Lucie County jail.

[Se ky bengal]

(12-23-2015, 01:53 PM)GMDino Wrote: Woman Assaults Husband For Farting In Bed

http://cbs12.com/news/top-stories/stories/vid_32346.shtml?wap=0

 Broken lip?

[Belsnickel]

(12-23-2015, 01:53 PM)GMDino Wrote: Woman Assaults Husband For Farting In Bed

http://cbs12.com/news/top-stories/stories/vid_32346.shtml?wap=0

Anyone else notice where it was from? Lucie, how are you doing?

[Se ky bengal]

(12-23-2015, 01:53 PM):GMDino Wrote: Woman Assaults Husband For Farting In Bed

http://cbs12.com/news/top-stories/stories/vid_32346.shtml?wap=0

Gas X Lucie?

[Devils Advocate]

(12-06-2015, 02:48 PM)oncemoreuntothejimbreech Wrote: I love that someone took the time to encourage an 8 year old.

The 8 yr old and/or his parents shoulda contacted the US patent office first. Delta and all the rest will steal this idea without thinking twice. Delta will claim all that swag they sent him was compensation. 

[GMDino]

(12-23-2015, 02:27 PM)Belsnickel Wrote: Anyone else notice where it was from? Lucie, how are you doing?

Maybe...

(12-23-2015, 02:32 PM)Se ky bengal Wrote: Gas X Lucie?

[Se ky bengal]

(12-23-2015, 02:56 PM)GMDino Wrote: Maybe...

I seen what you was doing here..

[GMDino]

(12-23-2015, 03:37 PM)Se ky bengal Wrote: I seen what you was doing here..

Honestly I would have posted it no matter what.  The location was just a little extra sweetness.  

[Se ky bengal]

(12-23-2015, 03:54 PM)GMDino Wrote: Honestly I would have posted it no matter what.  The location was just a little extra sweetness.  

[Rotobeast]

(12-23-2015, 03:54 PM)GMDino Wrote: Honestly I would have posted it no matter what.  The location was just a little extra sweetness.  

If you guys would quit stifling him and let him get it out here on the boards, his wife wouldn't have to go to these lengths. 

[GMDino]

A Woman Called 911 After Hearing Her Neighbor Chant 'ISIS Is Great' During Sex

http://distractify.com/trending/2015/12/23/margot-isis-sex-grandma?utm_content=inf_10_53_2&tse_id=INF_ed572bd7cb824fc9beccc9724c407688

Quote:Good news: we can all sleep a little more soundly tonight, knowing that our national security is in good hands. First we had Linda, the twitter hero who had her ideas about how to take on ISIS. And now this... On Sunday, an 82-year-old woman reportedly called the authorities in Brown Deer, Wisconsin when she heard her neighbor chanting "ISIS is good, ISIS is great," during sex.


Officers who arrived at the scene did not find any evidence of a brewing terror plot, nor did they have proof that the ISIS sex noises happened in the first place. However, they advised the woman to call back if she heard anything else.

Some funny twitter responses at the link.

Link to the news story here.

[RoyleRedlegs]

I'm genuinely curious as to the get-off for that....

[Rotobeast]

(12-26-2015, 11:03 PM)RoyleRedlegs Wrote: I'm genuinely curious as to the get-off for that....

I'd wager he was chanting " that ass is good, that ass is great !".

[Vlad]

Reasons why some are defecting ISIS...

"What I don't like is that if they don't like someone they just behead them."

"An absoluteley a miserable place to live"

Really?
That kind of talk you would expect to come from the American left, not Syrians.

http://www.vox.com/2015/12/23/10649808/isis-defectors-testimony

[GMDino]

https://www.rt.com/usa/327537-police-dui-medical-condition/

Quote:Twisting my sobriety: Woman escapes DUI charges by proving her body’s a brewery

A woman charged with drunk driving after being four times over the legal limit has had the case against her dismissed. The woman from upstate New York actually has a rare condition that converts the food she eats into alcohol.
The woman was pulled over while driving her car. Police asked her to take a breathalyzer test, then arrested her for having a blood alcohol level of four times the legal limit. However, the woman was found to have a rare condition called "auto-brewery syndrome,” which makes her digestive system convert the food she eats into alcohol.

"She had no idea she had this condition. Never felt tipsy. Nothing,” AP reported her lawyer, Joseph Marusak, as saying.


Marusak declined to identify his client to the media, citing her innocence of the charges – which were subsequently dismissed by a Buffalo court after he was able to provide medical proof that the woman had high levels of yeast in her intestines, which were turning high-carbohydrate foods into alcohol.

"At first glance, it seems like a get-out-of-jail-free card," said Jonathan Turley, a law professor at George Washington University, AP reported. "But it's not that easy. Courts tend to be skeptical of such claims. You have to be able to document the syndrome through recognized testing."

Marusak got in touch with Dr. Anup Kanodia, who was able to eventually diagnose the woman with auto-brewery syndrome. While waiting to see her, the lawyer arranged for medics to monitor his client on days when she did not drink alcohol. They took several blood samples to monitor her blood alcohol levels.


"At the end of the day, she had a blood-alcohol content of .36 without drinking any alcoholic beverages," Marusak said. He said the woman also bought a breathalyzer and blew into it every night for 18 days, registering around .20 every time. The legal limit for driving in the state of New York is just .08.

The evidence was submitted by Marusak and the case against the woman was eventually dropped.

Although the lawyer declined to identify his client, the Buffalo News reported her as being a 35-year-old schoolteacher. The publication also quoted the arresting officer as saying that the woman had bloodshot eyes and slurred speech, and that she failed several sobriety tests.