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I have recently written a couple of original jokes. I now believe it is time a for a career change. I am going to become a stand up comedian. Tell me what you think so far.
What do you call a person who doesn't know anything about trees?
A Treetard
I don't have anything against gay guys. I am just allergic to them. If I just barely touch one my penis swells up.
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Even though everybody uses it not a big fan of the "tard" being added to words.
Yet would not pelt you with rotten fruits and vegetables if you told them on stage.
The water tastes funny when you're far from your home,
yet it's only the thirsty that hunger to roam.
Roam the Jungle !
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Location: is everything.
Maybe you better stick to law.
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Location: Well, ain't this place a geographical oddity. Two weeks from everywhere!
Did you hear the joke about paper?
Nevermind, it's tear-ible.
![[Image: Zu8AdZv.png?1]](https://i.imgur.com/Zu8AdZv.png?1)
Deceitful, two-faced she-woman. Never trust a female, Delmar, remember that one simple precept and your time with me will not have been ill spent.
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(08-20-2018, 10:24 AM)Tiger Teeth Wrote: Maybe you better stick to law.
(08-20-2018, 03:42 PM)HarleyDog Wrote: But isn't the Law just another stage for comedians? 
As Willy Shakes said. "All the world's a stage. . . And one man in his time plays many parts".
I can be both a lawyer and a comedian. In fact I have been told that some of my courtroom performances were "absolute jokes".
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Maybe somewsomewhere in the middle of your set you can say "I'm a Bengals fan...(short pause)...that isn't a joke I'm just sad about it."
![[Image: 4CV0TeR.png]](https://i.imgur.com/4CV0TeR.png)
![[Image: DC42UUb.png]](https://i.imgur.com/DC42UUb.png)
